When the truth comes around the corner
by MGO
Summary: Hermione returns home after the Tri-wizard drama. She is hoping for a quiet summer. However once home she finds her parents in distress. Stories are told and her life is turned upside down. Events take her to Grimmauld place after just a week at home. Alone with Sirius and Remus will she find the truth there. no Sirius/Hermione dating but a lot of Sirius AU,
1. Chapter 1

This is the first chapter of a story I started to write when I had a writers block on 'to live a life'. I'm posting this to see if there is a good story in it. if readers will appreciate it.

So let me know if it's worth continuing.

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1. Coming home

She stepped of the Hogwarts express with a sad face. Her two best friends next to her were both silent. The last few days had been misery, between the excitement of the tri-wizard final task, Cedric's death and the return of Lord Voldemort they all were tired and drained. The added concern of Cornelius Fudge being difficult made the three wanted hide under thick covers and sleep away everything.

"I'll write you as soon as possible." Hermione promised Harry as she gave him a goodbye hug.

"I'm going to need that to stay sane." Harry muttered.

"Don't do anything stupid, please." She begged her best friend.

"I won't, or at least I'll try to behave." Harry smiled at her.

"Ronald, please write me back at least once to let me know when I can come to visit you all." Hermione said to her ginger friend.

"Of course we will Hermione." Molly Weasley answered for her son.

"Thanks, Mrs. Weasley. I really have to hurry, my parents are waiting." Hermione said as she hugged the woman that had become her second mother. "See you all soon." With that Hermione left the platform in search for her parents.

She found them just outside the magical barrier waiting among a lot of other muggle parents. Hermione rushed towards her parents and pulled them in a hug.

"Hello, darling. How was school?" Her father said as he let go of his only child.

"So exciting, so much happened this year, I don't even know where to start." Hermione said.

"Well, you have about an hour in the car to tell us quite a lot of details." Her mother laughed. That was exactly what Hermione did. Though she did edited out the scary parts, like Harry getting almost killed by a dragon, being put under an eerie spell for a foreign student to save her and most of all she left out the return of Lord Voldemort. The last wasn't completely voluntary. She honestly had to deal with it by herself first, she had to analyze it, over analyze it and break it down in understandable pieces before she would even try to explain it all to her parents.

Due to her story telling she didn't notice her parents were unusually silent. Even during dinner later that day Hermione was still too preoccupied with her own life that she didn't notice her parents distress.

When her mother served tea in the living room Hermione finally noticed something was off. The tears on her mother's face were now visible and shocked her to her core.

"Mom? What is wrong?" Hermione asked. Her question drew her father's attention away from the evening news.

"Oh, sweetheart, I know you are upset but we have to do this some day." Dan Granger said as he pulled his wife in his arms. Hermione watched her parents closely. If it weren't for the fact that they both were really upset it would have been a really sweet moment. Something Hermione was proud of was that her family was still lovingly together. Between job pressure and a witch for a daughter Hermione was afraid that her parents would follow the path of so many of their friends but they were still together and deeply in love.

Still to see her parents so distressed and in tears were shocking to Hermione.

"Mom? Dad? What is going on?"

Dan looked at her, Hermione could see pain and fear in his eyes and it started to really scare her. Over the last couple of years at Hogwarts she had dealt with too much of that, at home she just wanted peace and laughter and even maybe a good fictional book.

Once her mother calmed down a bit she sat down next to Hermione and took her hand.

"Mom?"

Her mother continued to look at her but didn't say anything.

"Hermione?" Her father started as he sat in the opposite chair. "You know we love you more than anything, right?"

His words scared her a bit. In movies or books those words were always followed by something bad. Still she nodded.

"We have to tell you something…" her father sighed. He took a sip of tea before he continued, "Something we vowed to tell you the moment he returned."

"He?" she asked confused

Her father picked up a piece of parchment that she hadn't noticed before. It had the Hogwarts logo on it.

"Lord Voldemort." He father said as he found the name he was looking for, causing Hermione to yelp and shudder. "Sorry." Her father muttered.

"No matter, please what is it you have to tell me?"

"Almost fifteen years ago we promised Dumbledore to tell you everything the moment he, the guy you yelped about, would return."

"Tell me everything? You have been communicating with Dumbledore when I was a baby? You knew a wizard, the greatest wizard before I received my Hogwarts letter? You have…" Hermione broke off when her father looked pleadingly at her.

"Please let me finish before I can't anymore." Her father begged. Hermione stayed quiet and looked at her father. He took a breath and launched into his story.

"Hermione, as much as we love you, you are not our biological daughter."

At that point Hermione wasn't even surprised, she had expected something bad like that.

"You were brought to us when you were just a few weeks old. Your biological mother was a witch."

"Was?" Hermione asked. Her father nodded at her.

"Yes, she died three weeks after giving birth to you. She and her… your family were killed by that guy who has returned."

Hermione gasped, Voldemort attacked her real mother! Her whole family! Almost a year before he had killed Harry's parents and vanished.

"You were brought to us by Professor McGonagall." Her father continued. "She had a letter from the headmaster explaining things to us and a three week old baby in her arm. Your mother and I wanted a child for so long but it never was meant to happen. So when the professor showed up with you on our doorstep we readily agreed to take you in and raise you as our own."

"We don't know why they came here, we had never had any contact with the wizarding world before." Her mother sobbed. "But we were so happy when we got to raise you that we never questioned it."

"What about a father?" Hermione whispered.

"The letter we got told us that nobody knew who your father was, the person in question didn't even knew he fathered a child."

"So nobody knows if he is still alive? If he is a wizard or muggle, nothing?"

"No, we don't know but maybe your headmaster knows. He promised that as soon as we told you he would visit and explain a bit more to you." Her father said.

The idea of Dumbledore visiting to explain it all made it only much more surreal. She just couldn't imagine what he would have to say. Did he know her mother? Did he know who her father was? Did he have secrets that needed to be revealed? Questions kept running through her head and she couldn't stop them, she wasn't even able to focus on her parents.

"What are you thinking, darling?" Her mother asked. It was only after three times the words reached Hermione.

"Everything and nothing all at once." Hermione breathed.

"Are you upset with us?" her mother asked in quivering voice.

"Upset? Why would I be upset with you?" Hermione asked. If her mind hadn't been so full of questions she probably would have known the answer before asking but everything was weird now, even her parent's questions.

"Well, because we have never told you before. Or because we had never told you, you weren't a real muggle-born witch. We had a hard time with that, especially when we heard about you being bullied about that. We wrote to Professor Dumbledore about it but he advised to stay with the agreed plan. He said that you were tough enough to deal with it."

"So, you really aren't upset?" Her mom asked again.

"No, no, just confused." Hermione said as she shook her head in confusion.

At that her mother broke down in tear and loud sobs.

"Oh, I was so afraid that you would hate us because of it." She cried.

Hermione wrapped her arms around her mother and held her while she cried. It pained her to see her mother in such a distress. Her father was looking at them, sadness emanated from his eyes.

"How did you found out he-who-must-not-be-named is back?" Hermione asked her father.

"We got a letter from professor McGonagall last night."

"Do you still have the letter Dumbledore wrote?" Hermione asked after her mother calmed down a bit.

"Yes." Her father answered.

"Can I read it?"

Her parents looked at each other and her father shrugged.

"Yes, you'll find out everything soon anyway. We had expected professor Dumbledore to be here already."

"I don't know. There were issues. Things that are more important." Hermione said thoughtfully.

They sat in silence for a long time all three Grangers lost in thought. Or at least the two older Grangers, Hermione was completely lost, she just didn't knew what to think. When the clock above the fireplace told them it was already eleven in the evening Hermione got up.

"I've to go to bed, I'm so tired." She said as she yawned.

Her mother looked up at her in surprise.

"Are you sure? I mean are you okay with it enough that you can sleep?"

"Yes, I'm just going to try and push it away so I can get some sleep, or at least I'm hoping it will work."

"Are you really sure?" her father asked.

"Yes, dad. There is nothing we can do now to chance anything anyway. I rather sleep while waiting for professor Dumbledore to arrive. Just wake me when he gets here."

Hermione knew she was kidding herself. She couldn't sleep. Tossing and turning around in her bed her head just came up with one question after the other. _Who was my mother? I always thought I looked like my father but he isn't even my real father. Who is my real father? Why doesn't anyone know who my father is? Why wasn't he with my biological mother? What happened between them? What happened with my biological mother? And what happened to any other family members she might have had? Who was she?_

Questions that just kept repeating in her head making it quite impossible to sleep at all. There was also something else that kept bugging her. The fact that Dumbledore was involved. It almost seemed like she was sucked into Harry's life story. Not because she would ever consider her part to be as important as his but because she knew it had been Dumbledore who had brought Harry to live with his aunt and uncle. He too was left at a stranger's house.

Harry's parents had died in the first war with Voldemort. Had both her biological parent suffered the same faith?

_Why had she survived?_ She asked herself as she glared at the clock on her nightstand. It was four in the morning and sleep still seemed elusive. Her survival had been the issue in her mind for the last hour or so. Hermione knew from all the research she had done that Voldemort didn't spare anyone. The fact that the beloved Cedric Diggory was dead showed how little Voldemort really cared for the magical blood. So if her biological mother was killed just a few weeks after giving birth, why was she still alive? _Had her mother hidden her? What happened?_

Frustrated by the lack of sleep Hermione decided to get up and take a long shower. Although she didn't expect him any time soon, she just hoped that Dumbledore would visit as he had promised her parents and had some answers for her. She really hoped that by the time it was late enough for bed again that she at least had some answers.

When she got downstairs her father and mother were already eating breakfast.

"Oh, darling, you look like you haven't slept at all." Her father said as he pulled her in a hug.

"I haven't, too many questions running through my head. It just wouldn't stop long enough to fall asleep."

Her father nodded understandingly. Now that she looked at him properly she noticed that he still looked tired as well. A quick glance towards her mother told her that they hadn't slept as well. Silently she prayed that Dumbledore would hurry up and keep his promise.

"Here is the letter. I found it in my drawer this morning." Her father said as he handed her an envelope with the Hogwarts seal.

Hermione swallowed the large lump in the throat away as she opened the official looking parchment.

_Dear Mr. and Mrs. Granger. _

_I am Albus Dumbledore, the head of Hogwarts, school for witchcraft and wizardry and the head of the Order of the Phoenix, a group of people fighting against those who seek to destroy our world. _

_I write this letter with an odd request. Accompanied by this letter you'll find a little girl. Lord Voldemort murdered her mother and family. He is the person we seek to stop. As it is unknown who her father is, this little girl is all alone and in need of a loving safe home. If word got out in the wizarding world that her mother had a child Lord Voldemort would hunt her down and murder her as well._

_To explain why I ask you this. Word has reached me that you have the wish to adopt a child and I hope that you will find it in your heart to adopt this little girl. When she turns eleven she will be asked to reclaim her spot in the magical world and I hope you will allow her too. Her family name is an important and well honored name in our world and it would be shame to have it waste away forever._

_Professor Minerva McGonagall shall answer any questions you have._

_I hope to meet you in person when the time calls for it._

_Yours sincerely_

_Albus Dumbledore._

"Is this all?" Hermione asked.

Her father nodded, "We of course had a lot of questions, not to mention that we had never heard of Hogwarts and the idea of magic was completely ridiculous to us but professor McGonagall stayed for two hours, explaining everything. The next year we received a letter from Professor Dumbledore that, that guy, who murdered your biological mother had vanished but that it was still dangerous. He told us that it was important that we would tell you the truth whenever he returned. He hoped that at that time you would be old enough to understand and recognize the dangers."

Hermione looked at her father for a long time. She tried to imagine McGonagall sitting with her parents explaining the magical world to them. Thinking back she realized that when her Hogwarts letter came her parents accepted it very easily. Too easily. They didn't doubt the truth of it for a second. She remembered McGonagall visiting them to explain everything but she had explained it to Hermione. Now she remembered that McGonagall never looked at her parents when she explained what is was like living in the magical world.

She glanced at the letter again. She realized that last night she had been right about one thing. Her biological mother had died at the hand of Voldemort in the first war, just like Harry's mother. The letter just didn't explain why and how.

Another question that popped up into her mind, _what was the Order of the Phoenix?_

Hermione's reverie was being cut short by a knock on the door. She noticed her mother and father looking at each other before her mother got up. Hermione and her father followed Ellen Granger as she walked toward the hallway and the front door.

"Good morning, Mrs. Granger." Hermione heard a very familiar voice. She jumped up as she realized Professor Dumbledore had arrived much sooner as she expected.

"Good morning, I take it you are Professor Dumbledore."

"I am indeed."

"Please come in and join us for a cup of tea."

"Gladly, but I like to talk to Hermione in private first. If that is alright with you, of course."

"I understand."

Hermione noticed how resigned her mother sounded. She got up from her chair to welcome the headmaster and as the door opened she stood eye to eye with a very tired looking professor Dumbledore.

"Ah, Ms. Granger. It's good to see you."

"Good morning professor Dumbledore." Hermione said with a smile.

"You two can have the living room all to yourselves. We'll be outside if you need anything." Her mother said after Dumbledore had the change to shake hands with her father. An awkward silence fell across the kitchen.

"Shall we?" Dumbledore said as he turned toward the living room. Hermione nodded and followed him. Once they were seated Dumbledore turned towards Hermione with a friendly smile.

"I take it you know why I am here?"

"My parents told me." Hermione answered.

"Good, I expect you to have many questions but I hope you will keep them to yourself as I tell you a bit more."

Hermione nodded, "I'll try, sir."

Dumbledore chuckled and conjured up two glasses of pumpkin juice.

"I don't know how much you have read about it but during the first war when Lord Voldemort terrorized the wizarding world there were very few who dared to fight against him. Naturally, I was one of them and because he had corrupted the ministry I decided to get a group together to go underground and fight him. The Order of the Phoenix we called ourselves. Many of the greatest witches and wizards of that time joined me. Some of them fresh out of school. They wanting nothing more than to free our would so they could raise their kids in a peaceful world and I was happy to have them."

"The first war was fought with great sacrifices and I fear this second time around won't be any different. After a few years the Order was joined by a very close group of friends who just got out of school. Lily Evans, Marlene McKinnon, Alice soon-to-be-Longbottom, Frank Longbottom, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew and James Potter. The marauders you know about. The rest had been really close friends with them since their fifth year. They worked and dueled as one. Everybody knew each other's moves like they had thought of it themselves. Together they were unbeatable. Your mother was the first of that group to pay the highest sacrifice." Dumbledore stopped talking for a second. Hermione wondered if he was about to cry because she swore she could see tears in his piercing blue eyes.

"Marlene McKinnon was your mother, Hermione." His voice was almost a whispered. "The night she was murdered she had taking her parents out for dinner as a thanks for their support during the pregnancy. She had just dropped you off at her aunt for the evening, when she returned home Death Eaters was already waiting for her. We found out five hours later. They were all dead."

"Why?" Hermione whispered through the tears that had started to flow.

"Marlene was one of our greatest assets to our team. She was so powerful and had so much knowledge of hexes and curses. She wasn't dark but she knew about as much about dark curses as Porfessor Snape does. She had studied them extensively. She wanted to know what she was fighting. Two months before you were born she and Lily were shopping for furniture when Death Eaters attacked them. With Lily being a muggle-born and Marlene being from a well-known blood-traitor family they had a reason for the attack. Between Lily and Marlene they hospitalized two Death Eaters and killed one. It was a severe blow to Lord Voldemort but one recognized Marlene and got away."

"And my father?"

"I don't know." Dumbledore sighed.

"You must have some ideas, sir."

"Oh, I have ideas. I had ideas from the moment she told me she was pregnant but I never asked. I thought she must have had good reason to keep the identity a secret. Once I asked if he knew, she said that he didn't knew and that she didn't want anyone to know."

"Why?"

"I asked that her as well. Hermione, you have to believe me when I say that Marlene was really happy to be pregnant and she really loved you, never doubt that. Her reason was very simple. She knew her life and her job were dangerous, that the world was so dangerous. She had seen so many families murdered, little children. Death Eaters don't differentiate. She just wanted you to stay hidden from the world until it was safe to show off a baby."

"Who knew?" Hermione whispered.

"Only a handful. Minerva McGonagall, she is Marlene's aunt so also your family. Lily knew because she and Marlene were more like sisters than friends, her parents and myself."

"How could she hide it? I mean when you are pregnant you get big."  
"She placed very strong Glamour spells on herself. Even until the last month we weren't able to tell. It was when she was at the end of her seventh month when I suggested she took a while off and enjoyed her pregnancy. I told the Order that she was on a research mission for us, only Lily and Minerva knew the truth."

Hermione brushed away the tears on her face.

"Do you think she has ever told anyone who my father was?"

"I think there was only one who knew. The one she trusted most." Dumbledore said softly.

"Lily Evans." Hermione sighed. "Harry's mom. So there is no one is left who should know."

Dumbledore nodded.

"Hermione, you are a very clever witch. You know how to do your research. You should be able to find it out."

Hermione looked at him, she was shocked. If she could figure it out surely Dumbledore would have done that a long time ago. Dumbledore's eyes twinkled, Hermione could almost see the humor behind them, was he testing her? Than suddenly a thought popped up.

"Professor, if I would do the research and if I were to find a man that could be my father is there any way to prove he really is my biological father?"

"Yes, there is a useful little spell. You need to bring him to me and I'll do it. Not because I am curious to see if I'm right but because the spell is as complicated as a fidelius charm. Must there come a time when I'm unable to do it ask Professor McGonagall."

Hermione nodded. She was starting to feel a bit overwhelmed as slowly all the information started to sink in.

"Hermione, are you alright with everything? You starting to get a bit pale." Dumbledore suddenly asked with a sound of a concerned parent.

"Yes, I'm alright. It is just so much information. I still can't wrap my head around the idea that my parents aren't really my parents."

"Your parents raised you as if you were their child. They love you deeply. That automatically makes them your parents. I know for a fact that Marlene loved you as well. She would have raised you with a great devotion, therefore is she your parent as well. You just have more than one pair of parents."

"Minus a dad." Hermione muttered.

"If your biological father is who I think he is… though I have more options than one and anyone of them would love to know they had a daughter and they will love you deeply as well."

They sat in silence for a while, a part of Hermione was irritated that Dumbledore just didn't tell her who he thought her father was, an other part of her couldn't wait for the challenge. Then there was a voice that still asked questions, always asking about her biological mother.

"Professor, can I asked you something about her?"

Dumbledore glanced at the clock quickly and Hermione started to feel let down but he turned towards her with a smile.

"I still have half an hour before I meet with Cornelius and I doubt that conversation will be as enjoyable as this one, so what do you want to know?"

"Actually, about Marlene's life, can you tell me a bit more about her?"

"I don't know much to be honest. I think Remus Lupin knows more about how she really was and maybe Sirius is willing to tell you about her as well. They were her friends through out school. What I can tell you is that you are a lot like her. You have the same facial structure and hair color, though yours is a bit more… unruly. You have same drive for finding answers. Marlene could study for hours. Also how you present yourself is much the same. Your posture and way of behaving is so alike. I remember Minerva talking to me the evening after your first day. She thought she had seen a ghost. You inherited Marlene's skills in research and in showing what a real friendship is. That's why the both of you were sorted in Gryffindor. Both you and your mother would be great in Ravenclaw but the ability to fight for your friends without hesitation and self preserve is what got the both of you in Gryffindor. Your connection with Harry and Mr. Weasley is very much like the connection Marlene shared with Lily."

Hermione watched the headmaster smile. He looked like he was very fond of his memories.

"Professor, you said professor McGonagall was my mother's aunt?"

"Ah, yes, yes. She is. Minerva is the only known blood relative to you at the moment. She was so excited when you came to Hogwarts. She loved Marlene very much and the two times she got to babysit you were her little moments of heaven."

"Why didn't she raise me?"

"It was too dangerous for you. You have to understand the McKinnon family were a long line of pure bloods. An old family, rich and they had great influence in the wizarding world. But their attitude towards the whole pure-blood thing was as such as that of the Weasley's. Still their influence caused Voldemort great trouble. He murdered them when it became too great. He set out the kill all blood relatives. With you being the sole heir to the McKinnon heirloom makes you a target as well. If word had reached him of Marlene's aunt taking care of a baby he would know how it was. Like with Harry, it was important for your own safety that we hid you away from the wizarding world."

Hermione thought his words over carefully, he made sense in some way but to truly understand it she would have to do some research into her family. She was sure she could ask the prophet for some information but maybe that was too risky.

"Hermione, I know you want to find many answers and I encourage you to do so. I would love nothing more than for you to find your biological father and maybe build up a relationship with him. I suggest you start with writing Minerva and maybe ask for a copy of the McKinnon family history from our library, I didn't have time to get it for you myself. Also I advise you to talk to Sirius and Remus about Marlene but be careful they both loved her very much and were hurt so much by her death. It could be that Remus might be able to talk about her but I don't know about Sirius. Just be careful."

Hermione sighed.

"I don't think I'll see any of them anytime soon and I don't have an owl to send to them."

"Oh yes, that was what I wanted to ask you as well." Professor Dumbledore chuckled. "With everything that is going on I have been working hard the last 12 hours to reinstate the Order of the Phoenix. Although you are way too young to be an active part of that I rather hoped you would agree to stay in the Order's headquarters for this summer. In a few weeks time the Weasley's will stay there as well and I'm sure later this summer Harry will join you there as well."

"Like a member?" Hermione asked excited.

"A sleeping member." Dumbledore chuckled. "You have to remember that you aren't off age yet, I can't let you join actively. Molly would surely kill me but Minerva will keep you more updated than Molly will. Minerva is still your official magical guardian."

Hermione nodded and smiled at her headmaster.

"I would love to help out."

"Good, I have somebody from the Order pick you up at the end of the week."

He and Hermione shook hands and Hermione let him out the door.

"Oh, Hermione, I think it's wise to keep much of this knowledge to yourself but I do understand if you want to share this with your friends, just be careful about what you share."

"I will, Professor."


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you all for your reviews. I try to reply to them personally but I don't have much time with 3 fanfic stories on the drawing board...

PLease don't forget to review!

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**2. Grimmauld place.**

For two days Hermione thought about a plan of approach. Ever practical she was trying to thinking up a plan but everything was too balanced by chance. How large was the chance that she would even be able to meet her father. He could be a muggle or one-night-stand for all she knew. She also thought about what to tell her friends. How to approach Remus and Sirius with the questions she had. It wasn't like she could walk up to them and say 'Hey, your dead friend Marlene had a daughter, I'm that child and I need to know who my dad is'. That was absolutely not done.

Three days after Dumbledore's visit she decided to take up his advise and write professor McGonagall.

_Dear Professor McGonagall._

_I hope you are having a nice summer holiday. I honestly think that you already know about why I'm writing. I have thought about what to write you and how to ask you the many questions I have. Professor Dumbledore has only managed to clear up a few._

_Basically it comes to the fact that I would like as much information on my biological mother, Marlene, as there is. Professor Dumbledore advised me to ask you first._

_I don't know how to explain everything that I feel at the moment and I'm sure my way of writing you isn't up to my standard but my mind is a bit of a jumble at the moment. I just hope that you will be able to help me._

_Love,_

_Hermione Granger._

Feeling completely unsatisfied with her letter to McGonagall she groaned and fell down on her bed. Life was becoming difficult very fast. For three days she hadn't been able to think straight and she hated not being able to think straight. She needed something else to focus on but nothing captured her attention for long. Even her beloved books weren't what they used to be, they didn't tell her how to feel and what to do.

As a gift from heaven a snowy white owl flew into her room and hooted happily.

"Hello Hedwig." She said with a smiled as she stroke the owl's feathers. "You have perfect timing."

The owl looked at her questionably and Hermione gave the owl a quick kiss on top of her head.

"I hope you will deliver a letter for me before flying home to Harry." The owl blinked its eyes and hooted happily. "Thanks Hedwig, you would really be a great help. Take some rest while I read Harry's letter and write him back." Hermione offered the owl some food and water before taking Harry's letter of her leg. She folded the parchment open and sat down.

_Dear Hermione,_

_I know it's only been three days since school but I'm already fed up with the Dursley's. Dudley stopped bullying me but instead he takes it out on the small kids from the neighborhood. I so wished I could just hex him. I know, I won't do anything stupid._

_Have you heard from Ron already, I can't wait for an invitation._

_I'm worried about Voldemort, why isn't the Prophet reporting any deaths or attacks. Surely our world is at war. All they report about is Fudge being stupid and Dumbledore getting senile. I hope you have some news for me._

_How are your free days? I bet you are enjoying all the free time to read._

_I hope you write back soon._

_Harry._

Hermione sighed and got up to get a quill and parchment to write back. It hurt to know that her best friend is so depressed. She knew she couldn't go to him or comfort him in any way other than writing a letter.

_Dear Harry,_

_I'm so sorry that you feel so down. I wished I could visit you or something but at the moment I can't and I don't think your family would be too happy about it._

_No, I haven't got any news about you-know-who. I get the same amount of information as you do. Like you I think the silence is a bit strange but it looks like you-know-who is laying low for the moment. Maybe he is gathering forces. I don't know really, I haven't been able to think clearly since I got home._

_It's nothing you should worry about. I just had some life changing news the evening we got back from Hogwarts and I'm still trying to deal with it. I can't tell much but I found out that my parents aren't my real parents, my biological mother was a witch and she was murdered. _

_You can imagine how confused I am at the moment but I promise to explain everything to you when I see you. Which I hope will be soon._

_Love,_

_Hermione._

After she watched Hedwig flying towards Hogwarts Hermione made her way downstairs. She knew that soon somebody from the Order would come to take her away from her parents. She decided to spend as much time as she could with them. They too were going through a difficult time.

Two days later Hermione was sitting at the dining table with her parents. They were talking about the summer and how they would miss Hermione when she went to the headquarters.

It hadn't been easy for Hermione to tell them that she would leave for the rest of the summer. She explained what was going on and what she was going to do as much as she possibly could. Still, they were all really sad, especially her father. He knew that his little girl would now go searching for her real father.

"I know, I will miss you too, I promise I'll write and I come skiing with you for Christmas." Hermione told her parents.

"Will you tell us when you find out who your father is?" her dad asked.

"You are, dad." Hermione said with an indulgent smile, "I know what you mean and I will."

As if the devil was playing with it her words were followed by a knock on the door. Hermione jumped up and grabbed her wand. Over the past two days, while she thought of her biological mother and her real heritage, she came to realize how dangerous her world was becoming. Since then she carried her wand everywhere. She had even forbidden her parents to answer the door after dark.

"Who is there?" she called.

"Minerva McGonagall!" came from the other side. Hermione peeked through the muggle peephole and saw her head of house standing patiently in front of a door. Quickly she stepped back and pulled the door open. Before she could even catch herself Hermione flung her arms around the elder woman and hugged her.

"Miss Granger." McGonagall said shocked. Hermione quickly stepped back and blushed.

"I'm sorry." She muttered.

"Don't be, I was just surprised." The woman said with more love than Hermione had ever heard. Within a second Hermione found herself back in the woman's warm embrace. "It has been difficult not to tell you, Hermione but Albus must have had his reasons. You look so much like Marlene, it scared me at first."

Hermione hugged the woman closely before letting go and looking up at her.

"It's been very confusing, I hope you bring some answers."

"Not now, Hermione. I will later this week but I'm here to escort you to the Order's headquarters."

"Oh, yes." Hermione flushed and stepped back. Only now did she remember they were still outside. "Please come in."

"Hermione! Darling, who is at the door?" She heard her mother call. She smiled up at her professor and led her into the kitchen.

It was a bit awkward at first but soon pleasantries and handshakes followed. Her parents had a lot of questions for McGonagall and Hermione waited patiently as the professor tried to answer their questions and calm their worries. From what Hermione made of it was that McGonagall didn't know much about her biological father either but she sure did know a lot about the McKinnon's.

_Tap, tap_

Hermione looked up to see Hedwig sitting on the window still looking at her.

"Hello girl." Hermione said happily as she let her in.

"Isn't that Potter's owl?" McGonagall asked.

"Yes, it's Hedwig." Hermione said happily as she relieved the owl from her letter. "Do I have time to read and reply?"

"Of course but not a letter on ten feet of parchment." McGonagall chuckled.

Hermione laughed and ran upstairs, figuring that she would write the letter there and grab her trunk while going back to Hedwig. Carefully she opened the letter.

_Dear Hermione,_

_I honestly don't know what to say to you. I think I understand how you feel. Your whole life you have been told that you are a muggle and one day out of the blue they tell you something very different. In my case it made sense but I don't know how you feel about that. _

_Do you know who your biological father is? Is he still alive? Did your mom died like my parent in the first war with Voldemort? I'm sure you can't answer it all at the moment but if you want to vent I'm here for you._

_On another note, I haven't heard anything from Ron or Dumbledore. You would expect that after all that has happened that at least Dumbledore would let me know what is going on. Do you know anything?_

_I hope you are well,_

_Love _

_Harry._

Hermione read the letter with tears in her eyes. She had known that Harry would understand her feelings completely. He had gone through almost the same thing when he found out about his parents. His words were reaching deep inside her. At least she had someone to talk to who would understand her.

Scrambling for a piece of parchment and a quill Hermione wrote her reply quickly.

_Dear Harry,_

_I knew you would understand. I'm relieved that I have someone who does. In all honesty I want to write down everything I know about my biological parents but due to safety issues I can't. I trust Hedwig but with Death Eaters roaming the land freely you never know._

_I can only tell you that you're right about the thing related to my mom. When I see you I'll tell you all about her. I think you would enjoy hearing about that piece of my life as well._

_McGonagall is here to bring me to a different location where I have more means to find my biological father. It's also a place that has something to do with your last issue. I'm sorry if I'm being too cryptic but I hope I can explain more soon. I don't know everything just yet._

_Just write Ron and tell him he's a git for not writing you._

_Love _

_Hermoine._

Yet again Hermione felt completely unsatisfied with her letter to Harry. Her heart was screaming for her to write it all down to tell Harry everything but she couldn't. Deep down she understood the dangers that involved being Marlene McKinnon's daughter, the last of that bloodline. Dumbledore hadn't told her completely 'no' but his words had pressed upon her the importance to keep it as quiet as possible.

With much difficulty and cursing at the underage restrictions law Hermione pulled her top-heavy trunk down the stairs. It would have been so much easier if she could just shrink her books. Even better, transfigure her full trunk into a feather. She hadn't even packed that many clothes, only three pair of muggle clothing, the rest were all her witch and school robes.

"Hermione, are you ready?" McGonagall called from the kitchen.

"Yes, give me a minute to send my letter to Harry."

After only three minutes Hedwig was a small speck in the evening sky. The adults in the kitchen were all watching the little witch that stared after the owl.

"Hermione?" McGonagall started softly.

Slowly Hemione turned around and looked up at her professor. She knew what was to come, she had to say goodbye to her parents for yet another year. Well at least until Christmas. Unlike any other summer she had not even spend two weeks at home and was already leaving. She knew her parents were afraid of never seeing her again. That she would find her real father and leave them. The air around them was filled with sadness.

"Don't worry, Hermione. If you want to visit during the summer it can be arranged. There will always be someone to bring you back here if you ask for it." McGonagall told her. It hurt the old witch to she her niece and favorite Gryffindor in such a state, so emotional.

"Thank you. I like that idea." Hermione whispered.

After a short but emotional goodbye to her parents Hermione left her childhood home with professor McGonagall knowing that when she returned she would be a different person.

"I'll transport your trunk first." McGonagall whispered. Pointing her wand at the heavy trunk that stood before them. With a blink of an eye it was gone.

"Where did you send it?" Hermione whispered.

"I can tell you yet, you'll see in just a minute or so. Have you ever read about side-along apparition?"

"Yes." Hermione whispered. She was slightly apprehensive about the idea of apparition but it was the easiest way of traveling, for so far she knew.

"Than you know what to do?" McGonagall said as she held out her arm.

Hermione would never admit it but she felt nervous to take a hold of the woman next to her. She had always looked at McGonagall as the strict teacher, someone to honor and respect but slowly she came to realize that the woman next to her was family. It gave her the comfort she needed to take the woman's arm in a tight grip.

"Hold on tight." McGonagall whispered. Hermione felt the woman twitch and suddenly the most uncomfortable feeling she ever had experienced came over her. It was like she was being sucked through a straw, the air was pushed out her body and her eyes watered. The whole sensation lasted for only a few seconds.

As her feet hit solid ground she gasped for air. The fresh intake of oxygen made her slightly light-headed.

"It's very uncomfortable the first time, you'll get used to it." The professor said as she made sure the girl was steady on her feat.

Hermione took a few deep breaths and smiled weakly at the woman next to her. She took a minute to get her head cleared and look around. By the looks of it they were standing in an old muggle neighborhood. The houses looked very old and not really well kept. They had landed between a couple of trees on small grassy playing field.

"Come on, let's be quick. Better not to linger here for long." McGonagall whispered. Hermione had to run to keep up with the tall woman as they made their way out off the small park towards an old row of houses. Hermione had a difficult time to believe that the Order of the Phoenix, that group of highly skilled witches and wizards would meet in such a depressing muggle neighborhood.

They crossed the street and stopped in front of a gate.

"Here read this." McGonagall said as she handed Hermione a small piece of parchment. She quickly glanced down.

_The headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix can be found at number 12 Grimmauld place, London_.

Hermione immediately recognized Dumbledore's handwriting but when she looked up she was confused, there wasn't a house numbered with 12.

"Just wait a second, remember what you have read." McGonagall whispered as she set the little parchment on fire.

Hermione thought about the words she had seen and suddenly a house appeared. Number 12 hanging next to it. As she watched the house got bigger and bigger, a door and windows appeared, it went on until the house looked like the others around it.

"How did that happen?" Hermione asked.

"Fidelius charm." McGonagall said with a smile.

"Oh, Professor Dumbledore is the secret keeper?"

"Yes, but better not talk about all that now. Ears might be listening. Come on, Sirius is waiting for us."

"Sirius?" Hermione asked in surprise.

"He'll explain everything to you. He will be so happy to have other company besides Remus."

A strange rush of excitement ran through Hermione as she followed the professor up the steps to the door but she pushed them away quickly. Her common sense told her she couldn't ask either Remus or Sirius about her mother yet. She knew she would need time and the right moment. _Maybe I will get that moment while I stay here_, she thought. It was depressing to know that they were the only ones who might know something about her biological father. What if they didn't know?

Professor McGonagall pulled out her wand to open the door but before she tapped it she turned to Hermione.

"Hermione, I know that you want answers, about your real father, about your mother, about the way she died and probably even about your heritage but please remember both Sirius and Remus loved your mother very much. Just like they loved Lily Potter. Marlene's death was a big blow for them. It changed everything about them. They lost their innocence when that happened. I'm not sure if they will be willing to talk about her at all, you have to be careful."

"Yes, professor. Can I ask something?"

"Of course."

"You said that I look a lot like Marlene. Professor Dumbledore told me so as well. Won't they notice? If Sirius and Remus knew her so well, wouldn't they see the similarities?"

"Albus and I have been wondering about that as well but Albus is very convinced that both Remus and Sirius believe that you are muggle-born and therefore they won't make the connection. But I remember Remus telling me when he taught you at Hogwarts that you made him think about Marlene a lot. Eerie, he had called it. So maybe now that you are spending time with them they will make the connection. If that ever happens I advise you to be honest and tell them the truth. If they won't believe you tell them to go to Dumbledore or come to me."

Hermione nodded, she could understand that keeping to the truth was the most important thing now. McGonagall's comparison with Lily helped Hermione understand what her mother had meant to Sirius and Remus. She knew Lily had been a close friend. Almost a sister.

McGonagall tapped the door with her wand. On the other side Hermione heard heavy locks opening.

"Stay as quiet as possible when you walk in, you don't want to disturb anything. I'll bring you to Sirius."

Hermione followed the witch in and looked around quickly. For a second she wondered if this was really her professor and not a Death Eater because the house was very fitting for a Death Eater. It was dark, dirty, and dusty and snakes were decorating walls, lamps and doors.

"Professor?" Hermione started in a whisper.

"Sirius will explain everything."

Feeling tense and nervous about the environment she found herself in Hermione searched for the wand she had hidden in her sleeve, just in case. Once she had the piece of wood in her hand she relaxed a little, at least she could defend herself now.

She followed the head of her house through what she thought was the darkest place she had ever seen. The chopped off elf heads almost made her vomit. _What kind of place is this?_ She wondered repeatedly.

They walked down a flight of stairs to a dark door, a small beam of light came through a crack and somebody was muttering in the room behind it. McGonagall opened the door and Hermione saw a dirty and cold looking kitchen with a long wooden table in the middle.

"Sirius?" McGonagall called. From a side door a head appeared, with dark, slightly curled but dirty hair and sparkling eyes beneath it.

"Ah Minnie." The man said.

"I'm here with Hermione."

"Oh, yes." Sirius got out of the door and walked up to the pair, his eyes dancing over the younger witch's face. Suddenly a charming smile started to form around his face and he look ten years younger. "Hello darling." Sirius said as he happily hugged Hermione.

"Hello Sirius." Hermione said a bit breathlessly as she returned the hug.

"Sirius I'm going to leave my best student with you. I'm expecting you to treat her well, feed her and be good company."

"Of course Minnie, you know how I love company." Sirius smiled innocently.

"That's why I'm telling you." McGonagall said strictly before turning to Hermione. "If there is anything wrong let me know. You can use the floo-network. I'll be back next Wednesday with the books and information you requested."

"Thank you." Hermione said.

They watched McGonagall walk away and the kitchen door fell close. Automatically Hermione tightened her grip on her wand. She hadn't forgotten about the house and how it made her feel. She turned to look at Sirius again, wondering if this was a trap or if this was really the man they saved.

Sirius looked at Hermione for a long time, she tried to read his face but it was impassive. It made her even more nervous.

"Have you had dinner already?" He suddenly asked.

"Yes, I had dinner with my parents before professor McGonagall showed up."

"Oh, that's good because I can't cook and Kreacher is missing again. Would you like to have a drink before I show you around?" For the first time Hermione recognized the honest smile on the man's face.

"I would love to."

Sirius pointed his wand at the table and two bottles of Butterbeer appeared.

"Come and join me by the fire." He said as he moved towards the other end of the room. A big fired was already roaring and although it was a warm summer evening outside it still felt cold in this dark house. Sirius conjured up an extra comfortable chair next to his.

"You should try to relax. I know it isn't easy in this house but you'll go crazy if you don't." Sirius murmured when he saw Hermione's eyes dancing around rapidly.

"This house is so dark." Hermione said with a heavy sigh.

"Tell me about it." Sirius groaned. He took a deep swing of his Butterbeer as he looked darkly into the fire.

"I can't figure out why Dumbledore would have you and me in a house that is more suitable for Slytherin's and Death Eaters."

Sirius let out a loud bark like laugh and turned his eyes to the young witch next to him.

"This house was the house of Slytherin's and Death Eaters. It's just that they are all dead, now it is the Headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix. The most useful purpose it has ever had."

"Why would Dumbledore use the house of a Death Eater and Slytherin for his fight against them?" Hermione asked confused.

"Because I offered it to him. This is now my house. It has been my home when I was a child and after my mom died it's mine again." Sirius explained darkly. "I don't like this house, too many bad memories but now it has a use again. Still I wish I could leave it, sometimes."

Hermione paled as she realized what Sirius was telling her. He had lived here when the first war started. He had lived with Death Eater and Slytherin's.

"I thought you were a Gryffindor?" she whispered.

"Oh I am!" Sirius said proudly. "I was the first Black to break the tradition. My parents and brother, actually my whole family was Slytherin's finest. You can imagine what happened when I got sorted in with James Potter and Remus Lupin. They all had a really big fit. I got howlers every day until Christmas. My brother became a Death Eater, so deep was my family into the dark shit."

"You must have felt horrible here." Hermione mused.

Sirius's face turned from dark and angry to something soft, a friendly smile formed around his lips.

"You are the first to get that so fast, even James needed a long explanation." He said softly. "I ran away when I was sixteen. I got so fed up with all the stupidity and the pure-blood nonsense, I couldn't take it anymore."

"Where did you go to?"

"James's parents. They were the only real parents I have ever known, Mrs. Potter always said I was her secondhand son."

Hermione nodded and smiled at the older man next to her. Although she had never had to deal with anything like that in her life, the way Sirius expressed himself was enough for her to understand the underlying emotions of how he had felt back then.

"You said you wished you could leave, why can't you?"

There was another loud bark like laugh before his face turned dark and angry again.

"Dumbledore doesn't allow it. He says I would only do damage to the Order if somebody sees me."

"How does he figure that?" Hermione asked.

"Well, he says that with Peter back with the Death Eaters they would probably know about my genius disguise. With so many Death Eaters infiltrated in the ministry and Fudge being stupid it won't be long before Aurors are out dog hunting. So I'm being locked up in this evil place."

It was silent for a while as Hermione thought about Sirius's words.

"Dumbledore has a point." Hermione mused. Form the corner of her eyes she noticed Sirius glaring at her. "It wouldn't do you any good to get yourself killed or imprisoned again. Harry would be devastated by that, but it still sucks big time."

"That's quite the understatement." Sirius growled. "Do you have any idea what it feels like to have lived here, imprisoned in the pure-blood madness as a child, than, when you finally start to live your life to be imprisoned for something you didn't do? Break out and be on the run, only to be locked up with a demented house-elf all over again."

"No I can't." Hermione said calmly. "Still I'm sure we all want you alive and well when this is all over. Can't you endure it until Harry defeats that evil man and your name is cleared?"

"I'm trying." Sirius groaned. "Do you think Harry will really do it, do you think he can?"

"I sure hope so. I have faith in him, he just needs some time to grow up and learn more."

They fell silent both got lost in their thoughts about Harry and his quest to defeat Voldemort. Even though Hermione had said it so casually they both realized that it would end with that. Harry facing Voldemort in an ultimate battle. Like it was already written in stone.

"Well at least I have you to keep me company, especially now that Remus is on a mission. I'm very happy to have you here." Sirius said happily.

"I'm happy to be here." Hermione yawned. "How are you spending your days here anyway?"

"Trying to get this house ready for the Weasleys to come and stay. It isn't really livable at the moment. It needs cleaning and getting rid of all the dark stuff. Beside that I'm feeding Buckbeak and hunt down that wretched house-elf to do his job."

Hermione gasped shocked but figured that Sirius wouldn't like being told off about house-elf treatment, so she decided to keep quiet about that for now.

"Do you need help with the house?"

"Would you like to help me?" he asked surprised.

"I have nothing better to do." Hermione shrugged.

"It will be dangerous, you wouldn't believe what my mom hid in this house but you are welcome to help where ever you can."

"Okay, and if you make sure we have food around here I'll cook until Mrs. Weasley gets here."

"That would be brilliant, I'm really not much of a cook." Sirius smiled. He emptied his bottle and got up. "Come on, I'll show you around and show you your bedroom. I have been making that one livable today. So it is clean."

Hermione nodded and followed Sirius back into the hallway. She noticed that Sirius too kept very quiet in the lower parts of the house.

"That's really horrible." Hermione whispered as she pointed to the house-elves heads on the wall. Sirius grunted and nodded slightly.

"We must be as silent as possible here, we don't want to wake up my darling mother." Sirius whispered as he pointed to a partly covered painting. When they reached the first floor Sirius started to become a bit noisier, Hermione figured she was allowed to talk again.

"What will happen when the painting wakes up?"

"The old hag will scream and screech all sorts of profanities." Sirius said with a grimace. "This here is the snug, if you can call it that. It has always been my favorite room because it's too small to have to many dark things in it. It's a nice place to read. It's my room and the others aren't welcome in it but I've made an exception for you and Remus. Please don't tell anyone about this place."

"I won't." Hermione promised.

"I know you like to read and that is really the best place to do it, the library is too dark."

"Library?" Hermione asked excited. The smile on her face made Sirius chuckled.

"Come on, I'll show you." He said as he walked a few long strides down the hall. "All old pure-blood houses have massive libraries. This house is no different but I must warn you that there some books that are better not to be opened. I have moved them all to the top shelves. You should stay away from them."

Hermione nodded as she followed him into a massive library. She gasped as she saw all the books, rows and rows of books. "Wow." She breathed causing Sirius to chuckle again.

"I'm glad someone appreciates them. Moony spends all his time here, reading. You two better make sure you keep me company as well."

"Of course I will, while you are drinking in front of the fire, I'm reading. I can even read out loud if you want me too." Hermione laughed.

Sirius laughed loudly along with her. "Maybe I'll keep you to that. A girl I went to school with used to do that. She looked a lot like you. Really into studying and all that stuff. She thought we weren't studying enough so one evening before our OWL's she just started to read out loud. I actually learned a lot from that."

Hermione noticed that at the end of his little story Sirius's eyes had become watery, like he was tearing up. Her gut feeling was telling her that Sirius was talking about her mother. She wanted to tell him that she knew about Lily and Marlene but she couldn't, not like this, not out off the bleu.

It took Sirius a second to recover but slowly he smiled again and looked down at Hermione.

"I would love to have you read for me but you look tired, shall I show you your room?"

"Please." Hermione smiled weakly.


	3. Chapter 3

****Thanks to all those who reviewed. I love reviews...So please keep them coming.

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**3. Pictures.**

It was well after midnight and Hermione still couldn't fall asleep. The bed Sirius had provided was really comfortable and the noises weren't much different than those from her own neighborhood but her mind was just too busy. She had been with Sirius for just two hours and she had already figured out how important her biological mother had been in his life. Maybe she didn't know the complete extend of that relationship but it was clear that Sirius had felt deeply for her. _Like for Lily_.

The strangest thing was that she just could imagine it all. She had seen the pictures in Harry's photo album Hagrid had given him and knew what Sirius, Lily, Remus and James had looked like. She could clearly imagine someone looking like her sitting in their midst talking to Lily about the boys not studying enough. It image looked terrifyingly a lot like her own life, even Ginny, her best friend, was a red head. Somehow it terrified Hermione that Remus and Sirius might just figure it all out on their own. Especially when Ginny would get there.

She decided to ask Harry to see the book again when he got there. She wanted to see if she could find her mother in it. She was almost sure that her mother had been Lily's bridesmaid or even maid of honor. She wanted to know how much she really looked like her mother.

Loud yelling and screaming waked Hermione up. FILTHY BLOOD TRAITOR, SCUM, DIRT TO BEFOUL MY NOBLE HOUSE!

With a jerk she sat up, very confused and sleepy. It took her a while to remember where she was and where that screaming sound came from but quickly the memories of the evening before came flooding back. With a shake of her head she got up and headed to the en-suite shower.

After a quick shower Hermione made her way down to the kitchen. She had promised to cook and although it was already late in the morning she couldn't imagine Sirius making breakfast for himself. When she entered the kitchen she noticed two people sitting at the end of the table. A girl slightly older than her sat at the end of the table. She had spiky pink hair and next to her sat a short foul looking man.

"Sirius? Care to tell me who this is?" The pink haired girl asked sassily. Her thoughts on the subject were very clear and Hermione felt very uncomfortable. Suddenly Sirius came walking around the corner with two plates of bacon, eggs and toast.

"Oh, that's Hermione Granger, she is one of Harry's friend. She actually saved me from the dementor's kiss a few years ago." Sirius said to squash the pink haired girl's ideas.

"Oh, really. So this is the smartest witch of the younger generation?"

"Yep the one and only." Sirius smiled. "Hermione do you want breakfast? Eggs and bacon is about the only thing I can cook so you are safe."

"Yes, please."

"Dora, Dung, introduce yourself properly to my guest." Sirius barked as he returned to the cooking area.

"Oh shit, where are my manners." The girl said and got up. She stumbled over to Hermione and held out her hand. "I'm Tonks."

"Hermione Granger. Tonks is your only name?" she asked suspiciously.

"No, but that's how I want to be named, it's my last name and my first name is hideous."

"Alright, Tonks it is than." Hermione said as she let go of her hand. Tonks seemed very happy go lucky. Somebody who is just easy to hang around with and by the way she walked very clumsy.

"Mundungus Fletcher, miss. It's good to meet you." The short man said as he shook her hand. Her initial feeling about the Dung as Sirius had called him wasn't really good, he seemed dirty.

As breakfast became a loud affair of people talking and chatting Hermione learned a lot. She learned a bit about the Order of the Phoenix, she learned that Tonks was Sirius's cousin. She heard about Tonks's job as an auror and what was going on inside the ministry. None of the others agreed with the ministries statements. Dung was very clear in his thoughts about the minister. She also learned about the fact that Harry always had a guard close by, something Hermione was sure Harry didn't know.

Most importantly she learned that Sirius was a fun guy to be with. He was funny, he could joke and laugh honestly as Tonks made silly comments. He could also tell stories pretty well and he loved to talk about his life at Hogwarts. It gave Hermione some hope that he would be willing to talk about her biological mother but as the stories continued she noticed that he never mentioned her. Sometimes he came close but changed his words quickly.

It was almost lunchtime when Tonks and Dung left.

"So what are we going to do today?" Sirius asked as he banished the plates and goblets to the sink.

"You are still in you pajamas, aren't you going to take a shower and get dressed." Hermione asked in surprise as she watched Sirius. After a looking at him more carefully Hermione realized that he looked like he hadn't had a shower in a long time.

"A shower?" Sirius asked confused.

"Yeah, a shower! I mean how long is it been since you had one?"

Sirius continued to look at her, slowly his confusing turned into a blush. The Sirius Black blushed.

"It's been a while." He mumbled. It made Hermione chuckle.

"Go and take a shower, clean yourself up. What will Professor Lupin and Harry say when they see you like this. I'll go and start cleaning the bedroom next to mine."

Sirius nodded and walked out the room up the stairs. Hermione chuckled slightly as she realized that she had already started treating Sirius just like Harry and Ron. _Men!_

After a long search for a bucket and cleaning tools and a run in with a strange house-elf that muttered all kinds of swearwords at her, Hermione made her way up the stairs and started to clean the bedroom next to her. It took her a lot of strength to open the rusted window but once she had them open the stale dusty air left the room quickly.

"I have never seen someone clean the house in muggle style before." Hermione heard behind her. She had been dusting and cleaning for a bit more than an hour. She turned around to see Sirius leaning against the doorframe, he looked clean and shaven but his hair was a mess.

"Since I'm not allowed to do magic, it's the only way. This room is almost done, care to help me?"

"Sure." Sirius said happily as he pulled out his wand.

"Good, after that we are going to do something about that beast that lives on top of your head."

"What beast?" Sirius asked in surprise.

"That what you would describe as hair, it's a mess." Hermione laughed. Sirius glared at her for a second but just as Hermione wondered if she had made a mistake he started to laugh along with her.

"You are right." He said as he ran his hand through his hair, it got stuck in there. "Lets get this finished and you can make me look handsome again."

Hermione had the time of her life that afternoon, Sirius showed her how to do house cleaning with only a wand and after they had a light supper made by Hermione they turned their focus on 'the beast' as Sirius started to called it.

It took Hermione more than an hour to trim, cut and comb Sirius's hair until it looked good. All the while Sirius complained loudly about his hair getting too short and that it hurt. It wasn't until Hermione compared him with a little girl that he stopped.

Later that evening they settled themselves in the snug for some reading and in Sirius's case drinking. Hermione had asked Sirius for a book about wizarding families. Claiming she wanted to know more about where the pure-blood madness came from Sirius showed her the rows of books dedicated to all the pure-blood families. She was very tempted to start with the book that included the Potters but thought that it wouldn't be fair to Harry to read that on first, so she searched for the book that included her mother's family. As it also included the Malfoy's Sirius didn't question her.

It's how they spend the first few days of Hermione's stay at the Black house. Sleeping in, in Sirius case sleeping through a hangover, cleaning the bedrooms, in the afternoon Hermione cooked for them, and than in the evening they would either, play a game, chat about Harry and their friendship or read in front of the fire. Hermione had read the book on the McKinnon's and the Malfoys. There had been a few other families but none had such an impressive history as both the McKinnon's and the Malfoy's. It wasn't a surprise anymore that Draco Malfoy walked with his nose stuck in the air, his family history was very impressive. They had been such a great addition to wizarding world that it made her wonder where that family had gone wrong.

Her own family's history was just as impressive. She found out that her great grandmother had been an expert in Transfiguration. She had done a lot of fieldwork on becoming an Animagus. She had published many research papers on how to teach a person to become an animagus. Transfiguration ran in the McKinnon's blood. Their complete wealth came from the early days of research and inventing in the field of Transfiguration. Even her grandmother had been a spell researcher. For first time Hermione felt very proud of her blood.

"Tonight is the weekly Order meeting." Sirius said on Wednesday during lunch. Hermione merely groaned to show she heard him. "Remus will be back and stay here for a while." Sirius mused.

"Meaning?" Hermione asked as she looked up from her plate.

"We should clean out his room this afternoon and you don't have to cook tonight, Molly is bringing food with her. I'll make sure you'll get something."

"Why can't I eat with you all?"

"Well firstly, Order things are discussed over dinner and I don't think they and with they I mean Molly want underage witches there and secondly Albus wrote us a letter about it, it came in when you were upstairs."

Sirius handed her the letter he talked about. Hermione folded the peace of parchment open.

_Dear Sirius and Hermione,_

_I just wanted to inform the two of you that we will have a big Order meeting tonight._

_Sirius I hope you will welcome us as always, Molly will be there early and make dinner. I also want to inform you that Remus will be back for a while. I hope you won't have any problem with him staying with you for a while._

_Hermione, I know I promised you could be a part of the Order but not active, your role will be played as a support for Harry, a coach and a friend, for now. I will keep you a bit more informed as I do with Harry but you must trust me that I have my reasons. Therefore I will ask you not to show yourself tonight we don't want Molly to drag you to the Burrow and she will when she sees you. Minerva will want to see you tonight and Remus knows that you are there besides that lets keep it quiet._

_Yours,_

_Albus Dumbledore._

Hermione felt a flare of anger running through her body, Dumbledore was already breaking his promises to her. It wasn't like she had expected anything from him but to let her out of the loop with the Order already was a bit off a blow. She had expected that she would be at least be allowed to hear about the Order's activities.

"You don't have to like it Hermione but that's how Dumbledore is." Sirius said softly. She raised her head from the letter to see understanding in Sirius's dark eyes.

"I know." Hermoine sighed. "He just promised me to involve me a bit more but I'm feeling I stepped into an hoax."

Sirius chuckled at that, for the first time in a while Hermione saw an honest smile on his face. It made him look a lot younger and healthier.

"I'll make it up to you, you can have the library tonight, all night. I'll make sure you get good food." Sirius said.

Hermione felt cheap for letting him buy her with the library but she wanted some time alone there. She had seen pictures she wanted to study without Sirius watching over her shoulder. She wanted to see if she could find her mother in them.

"Alright." Hermione sighed. "Lets get Remus's room done."

Later that evening Hermione found herself alone in the library. Sirius had kept his promise and served a delicious meal. Of course all honors went to Molly Weasley. Hermione had eaten and read through almost the whole evening but when she got too tired to focus on the text she moved to the row of pictures, in the far corner of the room.

Hermione had seen Sirius looking at them regularly. Sometimes he would mutter something to the pictures. When she had asked him about them he told her quite harshly that they were the only things that kept him going. They were pictures of his friends. Hermione was quick to conclude that the past was a painful subject to Sirius.

She got up and slowly walked over to the dark and dusty corner. The frames around the pictures glittered in the soft light of the candle. She started at the left side of the row, a picture with Sirius and James. They were waving happily at the camera. They looked so young in that picture, not much older than 13, Sirius's hair looked wild and just as untamable as James's.

The next picture was of a group of girls. Hermione easily recognized Harry's mother by her red hair and green eyes. The woman who was sitting on the left side of her looked very familiar but she couldn't really place her. On the other side of Lily sat a smaller girl, with dark curly hair, a heart shaped face and deep set eyes.

Hermione gasped as she recognized herself in that picture, the only thing that didn't match was that her own hair was wilder than the girl in the picture. Also her jaw was formed differently. There was no doubt in Hermione's mind that, that was Marlene.

The girls in the picture didn't look much older than Sirius and James had done in the first one but they didn't wave at the camera. Hermione thought they rather looked annoyed with the person who was taking the picture.

The next few pictures were all of Sirius and his friends, some from a Quidditch match. Some were taken during the summer vacation. Hermione even recognized Harry grandfather in one of them because he had the Potter signature hairstyle, raven black and messy.

The last three pictures really stood out. One of them was of a wedding. Hermione assumed it was the Potter's wedding. It showed Sirius dancing with her mother. To Hermione the picture looked really romantic, the dancing couple completely ignored the camera and gazed at each other. Like they were wrapped up in their own bubble of love as you see in romantic movies.

There was a picture of the group of friends at the end of the NEWTS, celebrating their freedom. It held five boys and three girls. Lily, Marlene and the woman Hermione was sure she had seen before. They were all laughing and cheering, looking extremely happy.

The last picture was much darker. The group of people in it smiled but it was clear it was a forced smile. It was a Christmas picture with a pregnant Lily by the looks of it. With a gasp Hermione realized that this picture was taken the Christmas after her mother had been killed.

_No wonder they all look so sad. _

She quickly put back that picture and returned to the picture that was taken at Hogwarts. It fascinated her, her mother did look a lot like her. She was actually surprised that Remus or Sirius hadn't noticed it. There were so many similarities. To Hermione there was just no way around it.

"That was the best day of my life." Somebody suddenly said. In a shriek of shock Hermione whirled around to face light brown eyes with matching hair.

"Professor Lupin." She said breathless.

The older man chuckled and reached out to steady her.

"Sorry, I didn't want to scare you and please call me Remus. I'm no professor anymore."

Hermione took a few deep breaths before she nodded. Remus let go of her shoulders and took the picture out of her hands.

"This was taken the last day of our NEWTS exams, finally free. I had big plans for the future, my friends and Dumbledore had convinced me that I could do anything with my future. I was very naive back than."

"These were your friends?" Hermione asked carefully.

"Yes, all of them. I'm sure you recognize many of them. Sirius, James and Lily. Myself and Peter, you know as well."

"What about this woman, I feel like I have seen her before but I can't place her?" Hermione asked about the person she didn't know.

"I'm sure she looks familiar to you. Her name is Alice, she is Neville's mother." Remus said softly.

"Neville's mother?" Hermione asked surprised.

"Yes, the man standing next to Sirius is his father, Frank. You see that Neville inherited much from his mother when it come to looks but he is as insecure as Frank. I remember we had almost had to ask Alice out for him."

"What happened to them?" Hermione asked. She felt a little scared to hear the answer, was it the same as her mother?

"Has Neville never told you?" Remus asked surprised.

"No. He doesn't talk about his parents."

"Than I won't tell you. It wouldn't be fair to Neville, he will tell you all whenever he is ready."

Hermione looked at the man for a second. His words sounded wise and calm, almost like Dumbledore. She decided that Remus probably was right and nodded.

"Who is the other woman in the picture?" Hermione asked carefully. Instead of watching the picture, she watched Remus. His eyes glued to the picture, he paled a bit and swallowed loudly. She could see his eyes getting wet.

"That's Marlene." He whispered. "Marlene McKinnon."

"What happened to her?" Hermione asked with a lump in her throat. It was clear to her that Remus had loved her mother very much.

"She was the first of us." He whispered. "She was so smart, fun and full of life. Like all of us she had big plans. She was so driven to accomplish what she wanted. She was a pureblood, like me, James and Sirius. We all knew each other from before Hogwarts but her pureblood status became her curse when her family turned against Voldemort. We were fighting back then, just like now but we were loosing. Marlene was the first from our close group of friends that we lost. She had thwarted Voldemort too many times."

Remus's story was broken, yet still Hermione completely understood what he was saying.

"You still miss her." Hermione softly whispered her realization. Remus's head snapped up to her, she hadn't meant for him to hear her words.

"I still miss them all, Marlene, Lily and James, Frank and Alice. As much as I did the first day I lost them. Not as much as Sirius does, though." Remus said darkly.

"What do you mean?"

"Sirius misses them very much, too much if you ask me. If he is alone he sits here, drinking and watching the pictures. I was really happy to hear that you were getting here to kick his butt around. He needs it. He needs to see why he can't give up on life. Our group of friends does remind me a lot like yours."

"How so?"

"You look exactly like Marlene, it's scary and if I didn't know better I would have said you were her sister or something. There are a few things that don't match, your hair and bits of your facial structure. The McKinnon's all had those doe eyes but you have golden flakes in them." Remus mused. Hermione blanched a bit at his words, should she tell him the truth? Could she already? She liked to think that Remus was a reasonable man and would listen to her but something inside her told her to wait.

"Anyways, Harry and Ron are exactly like James and Sirius. Only Sirius was the ladies man when he was that age and a bit older, never had the same girl for longer than a week. I see Lily in Ginny Weasley. The feisty red head that could deflate a big head easily, she's still too young for that but if she is anything like her brothers…"

"What about you?"

"Maybe I'm more like Neville, the outsider but appreciated anyway." Remus laughed. "What I meant to say is, how would you feel if one you got killed?"

Hermione gasped and looked directly at Remus, she paled, why would he ask that?

"I ask that for a reason, Hermione." Remus said as if he was reading her mind, "Our group was as close as your group of friends, all brothers, sisters and in some cases lovers. If you know how you feel when you loose Ron or Neville than you understand how I felt about loosing Marlene, Sirius is even worse, he and Marlene had this special connection. Almost like Fred and George have. Sirius would spend his days in sorrow, sadness and drunken stupor if someone doesn't kick him around."

"I'm not sure if I'm the right person to do that." Hermione mused. "I'm too young for him to even listen to me."

"From what I have seen you are doing a very fine job. You got him to take a shower and did his hair. At least he looks a lot better now." Remus smiled at the young witch. "Now, if you would excuse me, I'm going to join Sirius before all the Fire-Whiskey is gone. I need a drink."

She watched Remus walk out of the library at the same time McGonagall walked in. They exchanged a few soft words before with a short nod Remus vanished from the room. McGonagall turned to look at her. It wasn't a very stern look she was used to get from the witch but more one of pity and concern.

"They really loved her, didn't they?" Hermione whispered as she turned back to the pictures.

"Yes, they loved her as much as you love Harry and Ron. They loved her as much as they loved James and Lily." McGonagall said solemnly. "It will take a while before they are ready to open up about her. Especially now with the war starting again, it will bring up old bad memories."

"Remus, he did just now. A little." Hermione sobbed softly. "I hate it, I hate it that I have never known her. She sounds like somebody really special."

"But you do know her. Look in the mirror, there she is. A special girl, One that can love unconditionally, a smart young woman, a fierce and protective friend. All that she was lives inside you, Hermione. Never forget that."

It only made Hermione cry harder but the words really reached her heart. If McGonagall was right she could be for her friends what her mother had been for Sirius and Remus. Somehow it made her feel stronger.

"I have something for you." McGonagall whispered. "This is your mother's diary from school. We found it in her house after she was murdered. It took me a few days to find it, I had forgotten where I left it."

McGonagall held out an old leather bound book.

"Nobody has been able to read it. I have had them all those year but I figured that I would give it to you as soon as you were told the truth."

"Thank you." Hermione whispered as she took the book.

"Be careful, never let Remus or Sirius see that book. They will probably recognize it."

Hermione nodded and looked down at the old looking leather bound book. She felt excited that she could finally have an insight in her mother's life. Maybe she could find out who her father is.

"I'll leave you alone, now. If you have any questions you can write me." McGonagall smiled at her. "Oh this came flying in when I arrived. I didn't think Molly would have liked it to see your name on it."

She held out a letter, Hermione recognized Harry's handwriting. She had wondered why he hadn't written her back but she figured that his relatives were being difficult again.

"Good evening, Hermione." McGonagall said as she left the room.

"Good evening, professor."

Carefully not to make any noise Hermione walked back to her room and got ready for bed. She figured it was late already and she should get some sleep. Before dimming the light she opened Harry's letter.

_Hermione,_

_I'm sorry I took so much time to write you. I have been trying to get Ron writing to me but he's really lazy and doesn't write back a lot._

_McGonagall has taken you to another location? Really? Why? Is Ron with you? Are you at the Burrow or are you at Hogwarts? It would be so unfair if you were allowed to stay at Hogwarts and I'm stuck here. _

_The Dursley's haven't been really bad. They are just ignoring me… like Dumbledore does. Sirius has written me yesterday but his letters are just as empty, he only promises me that we will see each other soon._

_What I hate even more is that nobody thinks I should be informed about anything. I wouldn't be surprised if the ministry already has fallen and Death Eater will appear on my doorstep soon._

_Please, you are now in the magical world, give me some sort of information._

_Harry._

Hermione frowned at the letter. Harry was getting more and more desperate. She wondered if she should talk to Dumbledore or Sirius about this. She knew him. Harry would do something stupid when he gets angry and upset.

She decided to talk to Sirius in the morning and write to Harry after that. Maybe she could feed him some news, if there was any. With a glance at the diary that was begging to be read she dimmed the lights, closed her eyes and drifted off to a world of uneasy dreams and tears.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you all for the reviews. One comment on a review, the reason that Hermione had to stay hidden from Voldemort will come up later in the story. The McKinnons in my story have a long and interesting past.**

**Today I'll give you two chapters. Originally they were one but it got too long. Please review and tell me with you think...**

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4. The Diary

When she woke up she was still really tired. Her night had been haunted with images of Remus and Sirius crying over her mother's dead body. Too tired to get out of bed Hermione grabbed the dairy and opened the first page. Her mother's handwriting looked like hers. _How could people miss all the similarities_? She wondered.

After the initial shock she searched for all her Gryffindor courage to actually read the text.

_30__th__ of August 1971._

_Dear diary, _

_I got you today. My mom wanted me to write down my Hogwarts experience. She says it would be nice to re-read by the time my kids will go to school. So I better start today. The last day before becoming a Hogwarts student._

_Tomorrow I will have to take the train. I'm not all that nervous, more excited actually. All the things I can learn there and all the people I can meet. I already know a few people. I know Remus, Sirius and James are going. They told me all about their ideas for school when my mum and Mrs. Potter took us all out for shopping. Sirius is more nervous than I am, he is so afraid to be placed in Slytherin. James isn't worried. He says he'll be in Gryffindor. I just hope I'll be placed in a house where everybody is friendly and that I have really nice roommates._

_I am concerned about Lucius, Bellatrix and Narcissa, maybe even Nott. They will be there as well. Narcissa is in my year as well. I know her from the meetings my parents have to attend but she isn't really nice. I don't know much about the rest them but Sirius says they are really mean and snotty. I just hope I won't be sorted in with them._

_Well, mom is yelling that I should get my trunk ready so I better start packing._

_Love, Marlene._

Hermione was very surprised to see that the lines were already laid out. Marlene had been eleven when she wrote that and already she considering the to-be-Death-Eaters enemies. It was one pure blood gang against the other. One fighting for freedom and one for power. Somehow Hermione wasn't surprised that things had turned out the way they did. She wondered if it could ever stop.

With a sigh she read the next entry

_1__st__ of September 1971_

_Dear diary,_

_I'm at Hogwarts! It's so exciting. The sorting was a lot less scary than I expected. I'm in Gryffindor, can you believe it! My aunt is my head of house. Not that aunt Minerva will favor me but still it's nice to be around family. The sorting hat considered placing me in Ravenclaw, it said I was really smart but that I would have better use for it in Gryffindor._

_There are four other girls with me in the first year dorm. Two Muggle borns, Lily Evans and Ann Camden. It's really funny to see how surprised they are by things I take for granted. Like paintings, I didn't even know the muggle version didn't move. The other girls are Alice Wiggan, she's a half blood and Amoria Kettleburn._

_The boys aren't a really big surprise though, of course, James and Remus are in Gryffindor. A small boy named Peter Pettigrew as well. I didn't know him but James seems to know him. The biggest surprise of the sorting was that Sirius Black was put in Gryffindor. The first Black to not be in Slytherin. That crazy boy almost cried with happiness._

_I really have to get some sleep._

_Love, Marlene._

Hermione couldn't help but smile as she read the entry her mother made. The idea of Sirius crying because he made it into Gryffindor was something she couldn't imagine. The Sirius now seemed so confident in his status as a Gryffindor.

"Hermione!" Sirius suddenly called from downstairs. She heard his footsteps climbing the stairs. Although she was sure Sirius would knock before entering her bedroom she quickly hid the dairy.

"Hermione?" Sirius asked again as he knocked on the door. "Are you alright? Can I come in?"

"Yes!"

"Hermione?" Sirius asked as he carefully opened the door. "You aren't sick are you?"

"No, I didn't sleep well, I was still tired." Hermione answered truthfully.

"Are you ready to come out or do you want breakfast in bed?" Sirius asked with a joking glint.

"I'll get out." Hermione sighed, resigned to the fact that the dairy would have to wait.

"I'll go down and get some breakfast ready." Sirius said with a tired smile. It was only than that Hermione noticed that Sirius looked like he hadn't slept all night as well. Dark circles were clearly showing around his eyes and his hair was a mess again.

"Sirius!" Hermione called without even thinking.

"Yes, love." He said as he looked back to her.

"Uhm…Are you alright?" She asked softly.

Sirius looked at her for a second, there was a weird glint in his eyes. Hermione was scared that he was angry with her for asking but suddenly his shoulders slumped and he sighed.

"I'm fine, Hermione. I just had a difficult night and I need some caffeine." He left the room with a soft smile and Hermione sighed in relieve when she realized that he wasn't angry with her for asking.

Deciding that she needed some caffeine as well she got up and dressed in her house-suit. They weren't planning on doing much for the day besides cleaning the kitchen. There was no need for jeans and sweater.

"Sirius?" Hermione asked as she sat down next to him at the kitchen table.

"Yes?"

"Have you written to Harry lately?"

"I have, the day before yesterday. I got a letter from him so I replied as well as I can. You?"

"I got a letter last night. Harry is starting to sound desperate." Hermione said carefully. Sirius nodded in agreement.

"I have noticed it as well, Dumbledore and I had an argument about it last night."

Hermione looked up from her toast in surprise.

"Really?" she gasped.

"Yeah, maybe it wasn't the smartest thing to do but I was really fed up with listening to all the order members being important in the outside world while I sit in this hell-hole. When Molly told him about Harry's desperate letters to Ron and Ginny I realized that he was doing the same thing to Harry. I got angry." Sirius said with a shrug.

"I guess it didn't change anything." Hermione said as she looked at Sirius.

"No, Dumbledore maintains his opinion that's it is in Harry's best interest that he remains at the muggles."

Hermione thought about that for a while. She was sure that Harry would be well protected by all kinds of wards that Dumbledore had placed around the Dursley house but would they keep against the forces of Voldemort? He didn't have any wizards or witches protecting Harry when he was inside. What if these wards would break? Would Harry stay in that house? She was sure that Harry would go and wander off. He wouldn't want to stay inside with the Dursleys. That made him even more vulnerable for an attack.

And there was Harry's temper to consider. The point that Harry would be so fed up with it all that he would do something rash was approaching quickly. He knew now that Hermione was in the magical world, he knew Ron was there as well, all his friends were, his godfather is but nobody is telling him anything he feels he need to know. No, it would take long for Harry to do something rash.

"I don't agree with Dumbledore." Hermione stated as she poured herself a cup of coffee.

"And why not?" a new voice asked. In the opening of the kitchen door stood a tired looking Remus Lupin. She watched as the werewolf approached the table and sank down with a sigh. The full moon was approaching and she could see it had great effect on him. Sirius got up to pour him some coffee. "So why not?" he asked again when he had a bit of coffee.

"Harry, will at some point loose his temper. Either with the Dursley's, Dumbledore or anyone of us. If it's the Dursley's or Dumbledore he will probably leave Privet Drive. Run away in anger just like he did two years ago." Hermione explained.

"Do you really think he won't listen to Dumbledore?" Remus asked her.

"Yeah, he doesn't even listen to his best friends or godfather. Why on earth would he listen to an old man that doesn't seem to care for him?" Hermione stated logically. She had been friends with Harry long enough to know how his mind works.

Both Remus and Sirius shook their heads in denial.

"Fine, think what you want, somebody is going to get hurt." Hermione sighed, "and I'm afraid it will be either the Dursley's or us."

Both men didn't deny it but they didn't agree either.

Because they all had a rough long night Sirius decided that they would tackle the kitchen after lunch.

"The Weasleys won't be here this week, from what I understand they will arrive somewhere next week." He said as he cleared the breakfast plates.

"Next week?" Hermione asked surprised.

"Yeah, Molly thought I could use some help cleaning the house, so she decided to come here earlier. Her kids all want to help so they will be doing a bit of cleaning as well."

Hermione was a bit shocked at this news. She was happy to see her friends again and not having to cook anymore but their arrival will take away the peace and quiet to read and to search for her real father.

"Don't worry about it, love. We will still be able to have a bit of peace and quiet in our reading snug." Sirius said with a flirty wink that made Hermione chuckle.

"Really?" she asked.

"Yeah of course. I love your company and they won't set one foot in my snug. Only you and Remus have access to that room."

"What about the library?" Hermione asked carefully.

"Why wouldn't you be allowed in the library?" Sirius asked surprised.

"Well, with Mrs. Weasley here… and her being so protective I can see her making a fuss over all those books on dark arts and the cursed books."

"Oh don't worry about it, this is my house, if I say you are allowed in, you are allowed in! It's as simple as that, just be careful around Molly."

Hermione smiled widely at him and got up to help him clean up.

Later that morning she decided to write Harry back, at least she was being a good friend. She walked up the stairs in silence. She had been here long enough to know how to go about without waking up things that shouldn't be awakened. She sat down on her bed with a sigh, she felt still really tired. Grabbing Harry's letter, a quill and parchment she started on her answers.

_Dear Harry._

_I can't tell you where I am but I'm not at the Burrow or Hogwarts. It's because safety issues that I can't tell you, in case this letter falls into wrong hands. What I can tell you is that I know we will meet soon. Just hold on. Don't do anything stupid._

_I haven't found out anything about my real father. I have been reading and reading about old magical families but no information what so ever a possible connection to a father. It's really frustrating and it's interfering greatly with my study schedule I had drawn up for the summer but for once I realize that there is something more important than studying. Yeah, I wrote that. I'll do the homework later. Right now there is just too much going on. Though I read a lot about my mother's side of the family. It's really interesting to read about all their achievements. It sure clears up a lot._

_Honestly I can't wait to see you and tell you all about it, I found out a lot about things that should greatly interest you as well. Don't worry I didn't read up on the Potters. It just didn't feel right to do it before you had a chance._

_How do you think Ron will react when he hears that I'm not a muggle born? What do you think? I'm not sure if I want to tell him when I see him._

_On the news you so desperately want, where I am I get only bit of information. I haven't read the prophet since I arrived here but do not believe what they write, the reality isn't that. Everything is really quiet from what I know._

_Be careful._

_Love, Hermione._

After growling at the letter for containing actually nothing that would appease Harry and after praying a thousand times that Harry wouldn't blame her, she made her way back to Hedwig. The sweet owl had waited for her to reply and spend the night at the headquarters.

After lunch the three tired looking inhabitants started on the kitchen. It wasn't really dirty but they had to prepare it for the daily use of at least 6 more people. Not to mention Molly would have to live in there. While Hermione cleaned the table, the chairs and the cabinets, Remus and Sirius cleaned out the storage room, the fire crate and cleaned the stove.

Completely exhausted the all crashed on one of the chairs in the kitchen three hours later.

"Good merlin, I never knew cleaning a house could be so tiring." Hermione sighed as she rubbed her back.

"Yeah, thank gods for house elves." Sirius groaned.

The comment made Hermione growl silently at him, two days after she had arrived she had a big argument with Sirius about how he treated Kreacher. Though Hermione was sure he would never be abusive toward the old elf she still felt like he should be friendlier. Sirius of course disagreed. After a few heated discussions they had come to the understanding of agreeing to disagree.

Remus probably noticed the growing tension between the two and decided to change the subject.

"How will you explain that you are here before the Weasley's arrive to Molly, Hermione?" he asked.

"Oh, I don't know." Hermione said in surprise.

"We might want to ask Dumbledore about that." Sirius murmured.

"Or we could say that Dumbledore invited me and somebody picked me up and dropped me off here a day before they showed up." Hermione mused. "That will explain why I already know the layout of the house."

"That might work. We'll ask Dumbledore to tell Molly over the weekend. I'm sure there will be a meeting again." Sirius said.

"Yes, that might be a good idea, good thinking Hermione." Remus nodded.

Hermione smiled at him and got up with a groan.

"What are you going to do?" Sirius asked her.

"As much as I wanted to sit and not move until I can sleep walk upstairs to my bed, we still need to eat something. I'll have to start dinner some time today." She groaned. "For all the knowledge and magic the wizarding world fails in one big thing."

"And that is?" Remus asked.

"Pizza delivery and take outs."


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay second part of the chapter. I hope you like this one. It have been hard to write.**

**Please review, let me know your thoughts, good or bad... though I prefer the good ones...**

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5. Ghosts of the past.

Both Sirius and Remus laughed loudly. Neither of them couldn't deny the truth of Hermione's words.

"Hermione, you don't have to cook tonight!" Remus called behind her. "How about I go out and get some food from our favorite muggle haunt, Sirius?"

"You mean the Grill take out? Does it still exist?" Sirius said excited.

"Yeah, I found out a few days ago that it still exists, what do you say?"

"Merlin, it has been long, would you really go?" Sirius asked. Hermione saw a bit of the excited young man he had been in his teenage years. He had a big grin on his face, his eyes shone and he almost drooled at the thought of food.

"Yeah, lets do that." Remus chuckled, looking a lot happier himself as well.

A few minutes later Remus left in a set of clean clothes leaving Sirius and Hermione sitting in the kitchen. Sirius grabbed two butterbeers and motioned to Hermione to join him at the fire.

"So what is so special about this take out?" Hermione asked as she sat down.

"The Grill." Sirius sighed. "It is one of the best places ever. It's a small take-out diner in the muggle town close to where the Potter's had their summer retreat. Every summer we would go there, first just the four of us but when James started to date Lily the whole group went there. The food was good, the cook was really friendly and it was just so much fun." Sirius said. His voice sounded like he was dreaming, soft, happy and full of emotions.

"Sound like it." Hermione commented, hoping Sirius would continue talking about the past.

"It really was. I remember the last time I have been there so well. It was the summer before Lily got pregnant with Harry. It was getting darker in the wizarding world, James's parents dead, and my brother dead, more and more the Order was fighting and loosing. We needed a get away, just a night of fun, so we went out in the muggle world, Remus and Peter came along to the bar, just getting drunk and dance. Later that night Marlene got hungry so James suggested going to the Grill. Remus and Peter had to do guard duties early so it was just I, James, Lily and Marlene. We stayed there until we got kicked out."

It was the first time Sirius spoke of the past with out much trouble, he never stuttered and his breath never changed. He just smiled dreamingly into the flames.

Hermione looked at the man sitting next to her, wondering if she could ask.

"You and James must have had so much fun together." Hermione tried. Sirius looked at her for a few second, like he was thinking if he wanted to continue talking about it but slowly he smiled and nodded.

"Oh you bet we had. Remus and Peter were fun to hang out with, they were the best friends you could ever wish for but it was mostly me and James who knew best how to get into trouble." Sirius nodded. "That was until the girls decided to share their wisdom with us. I never knew hanging out with girls could be so much fun until James finally got to Lily. I knew Alice and Marlene from before school but when James started to date Lily we all grew closer and I'll tell you those girls were mean. They knew exactly how to get what they wanted and how to play a dirty prank on us but is was fun."

Sirius seemed to forget Hermione was there as he stopped talking and lingered in thought. Hermione let him for a short time but her curiosity got the better of her.

"I know Lily is Harry's mother, but the other two girls you mentioned, Remus explained a bit from a picture I was looking at but who are they really?" Hermione tried carefully.

Sirius looked up at her. Their eyes met and only then did she notice the real emotions that Sirius was battling. The feelings brought up when he spoke of the past. Remus had told her that Sirius dwelled too much on the past but she never understood it completely. Now, his eyes told her enough. He didn't linger on the past, he almost lived in the past, at least when he was thinking about it.

"What did Remus tell you about them?" he asked with a low voice.

"That the Alice you mentioned is Neville's mother. She did marry another friend of yours Frank, Neville's father. The other girl, Marlene was Lily's best friend."

Hermione had a hard time talking about Marlene like she didn't know her. He voice quivered a few times. She hoped Sirius would see it as her nervousness about asking him something so private.

Sirius continued to stare at her. For more than a minute he just looked, it made her feel a bit uncomfortable. When she started to squirm Sirius looked away and chuckled.

"Would you believe that I think you are Marlene's reincarnation?" He voice was colored with a dark tint but still really friendly.

"How so?"

"You look so much like her, it's freaky. The first time I saw you it scared the living daylights out of me. Not only in looks do you resemble her but also your character. Your cleverness and your hands on approach. That evening that you and Harry saved me and before, you were so fierce, so protective. You are just as outspoken as she was. Even Remus noticed the similarities." Sirius said. The longer he talked the sadder his voice became. Hermione felt tears sting, her eyes became watery just like Sirius's. A single tear left his eye and ran down his cheek.

"So much like her." He whispered as he met Hermione's eyes.

She slipped out of her chair and kneeled in front of Sirius, slowly taking his hand and squeezing it softly.

"You don't have to talk Sirius." She whispered. "If it hurts you this much."

"Thanks Hermione." Sirius said as he squeezed her hand softly. "But perhaps it's better that I do. Remus always claims I need to get it off my chest. I think I could do that better to you, you aren't from that time, you're an outsider on this."

_If he only knew_…she thought with a sigh.

"They must have been really special." Hermione said softly as she looked up at him. "If you still miss them so much."

"They were, all of them are. Not only the ones who died. Even Remus is in his own way very special to me." Sirius chuckled softly. "Alice and Frank were the most loyal friends somebody could ever wish to have. They really didn't deserve what they got. James was my first friend. I met him when I was eight. He never doubted me, or my loyalty to Dumbledore and the light side. When he fell head over heals in love with Lily, I teased him relentlessly but he only laughed it off. Claiming that I would one day understand what it is to really love somebody. All the teasing I did, or complaining, James never got angry with me, he would just smile and except my foolishness."

Sirius was smiling now as he talked. Hermione could almost see all those good memories. Hermione let him take his time. She hoped that at some point he would tell her about Marlene. It was probably really hard for him, it had been so hard for Remus as well and he said that he thought Sirius had even a harder time with her death.

"Lily was a real bitch." Sirius said as he looked at Hermione. "A nosy know-it-all and whatever she saw in Snivellus is still beyond me. I'm sure for the first five years she thought of me as a sex driving bigheaded idiot. She always complained about how we never studied or how big our head was. Boy did she yell at us for our pranks." Sirius laughed. "The summer after our OWL's her parents got murdered. Naturally, James wanted to be there for her. He invited her to the Potter summer house. Lily didn't know what else to do and accepted. Mrs. Potter took care of her. She really became a second mother to Lily those months. It was one of the saddest and best summers I had ever had. After that Lily was a part of the team and with her, her friends."

Hermione nodded. "Alice and Marlene." She muttered.

"No and yes." Sirius said slowly. "Alice had been friends with Lily since the first day. As was Marlene but Alice and Lily were so much alike that they naturally turned to each other in those first years. Also in their disdain for us. To them at first we were annoying little rich boys that never had to do a thing in their life. Which we were, you might note."

The proud face Sirius was showing made Hermione chuckled.

"Marlene was different. She came from the same background as James, Remus and I did. All of us coming from ancient wizarding families. We all knew each other from before school. Marlene considered us as her friends from the start. Even though she shouted at us on a daily basis she was one of us. She was the girl I told you about when you came here. She decided that we didn't study enough. So she started to read out loud for the whole common room. Thanks to her I passed my OWL's without opening a book."

"Really, not a book?" Hermione asked shocked, if it wasn't for her new project she would already have been studying for her OWL's.

"Nothing for the whole year." Sirius said proudly.

"Unbelievable." Hermione breathed. Sirius laughed and nodded before his smile fell.

"Since that summer the group became closer. The murder of Lily's parents and a year later James's parents showed us how serious everything were becoming. Nobody could separate us. We were there for each other. Always having the other's back. Dumbledore asked us to join the Order after the Potter's were murdered. Everybody agreed immediately. Days after days we found empty classrooms to train in dueling. Marlene was one of our best duelists. I still can't believe she was the first to go."

Sirius let out a soft whimper that made Hermione cry. Tears ran down her face as she pulled the adult man in a hug.

"You loved her." She whispered.

"So much." Sirius nodded. "We all did. Everybody was broken after that."

"I can't imagine." Hermione sighed.

"We all thought Lily would stay in it. She was the one who found Marlene and her family. Her best friend was dead. Brutally murdered by Voldemort himself. She wouldn't eat. She wouldn't talk. It should have been such a happy time but it was the worst time of my life. The pain of loosing Marlene, the fear for Lily's health, the fear of being the next that would die."

They both fell silent. Hermione sat on the arm of the chair, her arms wrapped around Sirius, her head on his shoulder. Both stared in the fire.

"What is your best memory of Marlene?" Hermione asked after a while.

"I'd rather not tell you." Sirius said softly.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Hermione automatically said. She didn't want to butt in on his private life but she was just curious.

"Don't be, it's just not meant for your young innocent ears." Sirius chuckled. Hermione pulled back and looked at the man. His eyes twinkled and he smiled wickedly.

"Sirius and Marlene had their little thing, you better not ask. The details are gruesome, especially for those who accidentally were confronted with the visual." Somebody said from the other end of the kitchen.

In the door way stood Remus, two plastic bags full with food in his hands. He stood leaning against the doorpost looking at them. A fond smile covered his face.

"You have easy talking, Moony. I remember clearly that you were the first that got to Marlene!" Sirius countered. Making Hermione almost gasp in shock. She could live with the thought of her mother and Sirius being together like that but also with Remus. She couldn't and wouldn't believe that her mother had slept around.

She knew she was quite prudish when it came to sex, boys and all things involved but she wanted it like that. She felt a lot more comfortable not drawing attention to herself. The Yule ball had been great and all but she didn't really liked to draw attention with her body. She was the brain.

But than again she knew what other girls did, her mother could have been like that.

"I know Hermione but there is no reason to be so shocked. Remus here was quite the womanizer in his days." Sirius laughed as he got up and placed his hand on her shoulder. Hermione was relieved that he had mistaken the reasons behind her shock.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't tell lies Sirius. Lets eat." Remus said with a smile holding up the bags.

"What did you get?" Sirius said eagerly as he steered Hermione towards the table.

Remus smiled at him as he handed Sirius a bag.

"Spare ribs, with sweet sauce and chips." Remus answered.

"Spare ribs?" Hermione asked as she sat down. "That's your favorite?"

"Yes." Sirius said happily.

"It's easy to explain Hermione, you see, Padfoot here enjoyed bones as much as any other dog would."

"God no!?"

"Yeah, dogs like their bones." Sirius defended himself. Making both Remus and Hermione laugh.

"I got you steak and salad, Hermione. That's what the ladies used to eat."

"Thanks, it smells wonderful." Hermione said as she opened her.

"What did you get, Moony?"

"Rare t-bone steak." He said with a smile.

For a while they ate in silence. Hermione had to admit it was really good for a take out. The steak was a medium grilled and seasoned with herbs that she thought came from South America.

"Merlin! It still taste like sixteen years ago." Sirius moaned.

"It sure does." Remus agreed.

"Tell me a bit about back then? How was it? What did you do besides making trouble?" Hermione asked quite boldly. She was honestly interested in their lives but she secretly hoped to find out a bit more about her mother.

Both Sirius and Remus smiled at her, both men looked very mischievous.

"The times we went to the Grill were the best days of our lives." Sirius sighed. "We went there during the summers when we were staying at the Potters but after school we went there at least once every fortnight. Just hanging out and enjoying the good food. We were full of dreams of the future back then. We were just initiated as full members of the Order of the Phoenix and stared real battle training. It was a intensive program given by Moody. His training made us think we were invincible. And we were in the battles we had fought. We never lost a fight as long as we were together. Life was good. We had our missions for the Order and they did show us the dark side of life. Those missions kept our feet on the ground and in the reality of life but within our group life was perfect."

"Did any of you have something outside that group? Friends? Hobby's?" Hermione asked.

"No not really." Remus said. "We had family, or at least Marlene, Alice, Frank and I had but besides that it was just us."

"And there wasn't much time for hobby's. James, Remus and I made it a point to visit at least one Quidditch match each month just to get away but mainly it was training and battling with Death Eaters." Sirius commented.

"Besides hanging out in the Grill, what else did you all do in your free time?"

"Not much, actually." Sirius said thoughtfully. "It was too dangerous to go out that often. Sometimes we would go to a bar or muggle club. It was a bit saver for us to hang out in the muggle world but after James and Lily got married we were at their place a lot."

"What about work?"

"Only Lily took a real job, she and James fought about it constantly. James was scared that Lily would get killed while at work but she wanted to prove that a muggle born was just as good as a pure blood."

"What did she do?"

"She worked in the Department of Mysteries. She did something with charms but she wasn't allowed to speak about it a lot. I just know she loved it."

"So you never worked?" Hermione asked a bit skeptical.

"You have to understand Hermione that for us it became very difficult to find a job. For me, for obvious reasons. Sirius would never been allowed in the ministry of magic as an auror because of his family. They would withdraw their support to the minister if Sirius ever set a foot in the ministry. James was too known for supporting Dumbledore, as were Marlene and Frank."

"By than the ministry was almost completely in control of Voldemort. Except for the minister himself and the head of the Department for mysteries. That's why Lily did get the job and that's why James was so freaked out about her working there." Sirius explained.

"But how did you get money to survive? I mean you needed money buy food and all?" Hermione asked. Her question made Sirius laughed loudly.

"Dear Hermione, you have been reading about old pure blooded families for days now! Don't you understand where our money came from?" he asked.

"Old money…" Hermione tried.

"Yes, and lots of it. That was one of the two the reasons for the arguments between Lily and James. James thought it ridiculous that Lily wanted to work. They could have lived like the muggle Queen and make no dent in their vaults. It was the same for me, Frank and Marlene. Dumbledore paid Remus for his services to the Order so he had no need to go through the horrors of finding a job." Sirius sounded quite the spoiled brat as he explained it all but thinking about it everything made sense. The old wizarding families just had a lot of gold.


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry for the long wait. This story isn't the main focus at the moment while I'm trying to get a few chapter for 'to live a life' done. However I had a chapter finished and waiting to be uploaded. So I hope you enjoy it.**

**Please review.**

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While finishing dinner Remus told Hermione a bit more about life during the first war. Sadly Remus kept his explanation very general. None of them ever mentioned James, Lily or Marlene again.

Completely exhausted Hermione crashed down on her bed immediately after dinner. She had left Remus and Sirius behind in the kitchen just when Tonks made her appearance. After a quick hello Hermione had dragged herself up the stairs.

She wanted to read the diary and think about all that she had found out today but she fell asleep immediately. She dreamed about Hogwarts and the time her mother would have been there. In her dream she walked along a red head, she knew her to be Lily, they were talking about Sirius.

"_He is hot Lils, you can't deny that." The dream Marlene said._

"_He is annoying, he never takes anything serious." The dream Lily countered._

"_Oh, I know some things he does take serious." The dream Marlene giggle._

"_Marlene! You whore! First Remus and now Sirius! Unbelievable." The dream Lily said in mock shock._

"_Oh, Lils, relax, you'll see once James really get's to you." the dream Marlene laughed._

"_Yeah, yeah. Just drop that subject." The dream Lily said angrily. "But seriously aren't you afraid of getting pregnant?"_

"_No! of course not, there are spells and potions to prevent that." The dream Marlene said a bit surprised. "Besides, neither Remus or Sirius would be a bad choice to father a child. I wouldn't mind it, once I'm older."_

"_Unbelievable." The dream Lily sighed and shook her head_.

Hermione jolted up from the bed. She shivered from shock. Her dream still played in her head. After a few calming breathes she decided it was just a dream.

After a short trip to the bathroom Hermione settled back in her bed. The sun was already rising but she gathered it was still too early to start on breakfast. Not tired anymore she rolled over and grabbed the diary from under her trunk. She flipped through the pages, seriously tempted to start in the back in the hope to find out if there was anything written about a possible father but she continued where she left off.

_2__nd__ of September 1971_

_Dear Dairy,_

_Pfff, my first day of attending classes at Hogwarts is drawing to an end. And it was amazing! _

_My first class was potions. Slughorn is a strange guy but a good teacher. I also had Charms and Transfigurations. Aunt Minerva teaches the last one. It's a bit strange to call her professor but I'll get used to that._

_The lessons are really interesting and though we all start on the same level, with the same amount of education I can easy see that those who are raised in the magical world don't have as much starting problems than muggle borns. Lily questions everything. It's like she doubts magic exists._

_Sadly we have a lot of classes with the Slytherin's. Sirius and James cause a lot of problems with them. For some reason James seems intend on hating this poor boy named Snape. It all ended up in points being taken from Gryffindor and a shouting match between Lily and James._

_Lily seems to be really taken with the Slytherin but she won't let us even ask why, she is very protective of him._

_Anyway, school turns out to be more than I ever expected. I'm sure I'm going to have a great time here._

_Love Marlene._

Hermione laughed at the entry. Her mother was indeed a lot like her. She had felt the same way about her first day. Even though she didn't have any people she knew or friends there, she had been excited about the lessons and about the prospect of spending seven years in the castle.

She skimmed through the next couple of entries. All were about normal life in Gryffindor house. Hermione stopped a few times when she saw Lily's name but it was clear that she wasn't really a friend to Marlene. Lily did spend a lot of time with the Snape boy.

It left her in a bit of shock to find out that Harry's mother and their potions master were such a good friends. Hermione knew that Harry never knew about that part of his mother's life. If he did, he never spoke a word of it. She decided that she wouldn't mention it to Harry. It was a part of his life and she didn't want to invade that.

It became clear that Marlene saw Alice as her best friend in Gryffindor but that she cared for every girl in her house. Besides that she really enjoyed hanging around with the boys. If anything Marlene felt closest to them.

Hermione continued skimming through the entries. Nothing big happened in Marlene's life for the first three years at Hogwarts. She laughed at James's antics about Lily. She wrote about how funny Sirius, James and Remus could be and how their pranks often went haywire, making Peter a victim. She enjoyed studying magic. Many entries were short because Marlene had been too tired from studying.

Hermione stopped at an entry that looked frantic. Her mother's handwriting wasn't as neat as it had been in all the other entries. Like she was really excited or panicked about some thing.

_7__th__ of January 1973_.

_Dear Dairy,_

_OH MERLIN'S PANTS! OH MERLIN! I just figured something out! Remus is a werewolf! Can you believe it! I can't but I'm really sure he is. I don't know what to think. I don't know who else knows, I'm sure Dumbledore knows but I can't run to the headmaster and why would I run? I don't think we are in any danger with him here. It doesn't seem like he is in the castle during the full moon._

_I don't know what to think. He is a werewolf for Merlin's sake!_

_Love Marlene._

Hermione looked at the date above the entry. Her mother had written it halfway through her third year. Almost around the same period she found out about Remus being a werewolf. The next entry was a bit less chaotic.

_7__th__ of January 1973._

_Dear Diary._

_Okay I have calmed down a bit. I was just so shocked to find out that… that sweet boy is in fact a werewolf. At first I freaked out. We are always told that they are dangerous and unsocial but with Remus that clearly is not the case. He is just so sweet and caring. I also figured out that at least James and Sirius know about it as well. I finally know what James means with "Remus's furry little problem". _

_I'm really happy for Remus that he has understanding friends. I wonder what I should do. Should I let him know that I found out about his furry little problem? How will he react? _

_I don't know what to do about it yet but it would be nice to be able to talk about it with somebody. Maybe I should talk to James and Sirius first._

_Love Marlene._

Hermione quickly turned the page to see if Marlene had talked to the boys about it. To her surprise her mother had talked to Remus the next day already.

_8__th__ of January 1973._

_Dear diary._

_I can't keep my mouth shut even if I really wanted too. I found Remus with James and Sirius planning one of their jokes on Snape in an empty classroom. Something in me pushed me to go and talk to them._

_It was harder than I thought it would be. I just walked in asked if I could have a word with them. I think Remus already suspected the reason because he turned very pale. Sirius and James nodded carefully and than I just blurted out 'I know about your furry little problem'. I was so harsh! Stupid me! _

_Sirius almost killed me. He was ready to silence me forever. James just got really angry with me. They just all got the idea that I would be spilling Remus secret. I managed to explain quite quickly that I would never do that. Of course they demanded an explanation. All the while Remus was really silent, letting James and Sirius do all the talking._

_I felt so bad afterwards that I pulled Remus apart after potions and talked to him about it. He was really scared I would treat him different now that I knew and be scared of him. As if I could do that!_

_To be honest I think I'm starting to develop a little crush on him. _

Hermione stopped reading in complete shock. She stared at the page in utter disbelieve. Here she was reading her mother confessing having a crush on her professor just after she found out about him being a werewolf. Why? What did she see in him?

_I know it's silly, having a crush on him with him being a werewolf and all but Remus is so sweet, so caring, he is really smart and really he is very handsome. Not the roughish good looks that Sirius and James have but more subtle. I don't really know how to describe it._

_Still it's just a crush. I really should focus on my schoolwork._

_Love Marlene._

'My mother had a serious crush on Remus' Hermione thought as she closed the diary. Though she realized that her mother had only been fourteen years old when she wrote that, Hermione still wondered if it could be. 'Could Remus be my father?'

It was the question that continued to repeat in her head as she showered and dressed.

'No, crushes come and go. They were young.' She argued with herself but an annoying voice inside her head kept repeating Sirius's words from last night, _'Remus got to her first'_, it indicated that her mother had sex with Remus. 'But that was before Sirius had.' She countered herself.

She stopped and looked at herself in the mirror, inspecting her face. She could see that she looked a lot like her mother. Her eyes were the same, instead of the golden flecks. The shape of her face was the same as well, though her jaw was set a bit wider. Her hair was colored a bit darker and was wilder than she had seen in the picture of her mother.

She annoyed herself with comparing those features that stood out to that of Sirius and Remus. Her hair wasn't the sandy blond from Remus but it wasn't as dark as Sirius's. Though she knew for a fact that her hair was just as untamable as that beast that lived on Sirius's head. Her jaw did look like that of Sirius but she was sure she was imagining that. Both Remus and Sirius had the same gold color in their eyes so that wasn't very useful.

Frustrated Hermione sighed and kicked against the bedpost.

"Urgh! Why can't Dumbledore just tell me where to look!" she yelled in frustration. Suddenly everything became too much. The emotions and the truth of what had happened to her over the last two weeks came crashing down around her.

She stumbled towards her bed and sank down and tears came streaking down her cheeks. Her shoulders started to shake uncontrollably. Slowly her head filled with thoughts and questions. Everything resurfaced. The shock of the return of Voldemort, the death of Cedric, the horror of learning about how Harry had been able to deal with Voldemort again but she could have dealt with all that if she would have had a normal summer. A nice warm summer with her loving and caring parents. Now even that was almost ripped away from her. She wasn't even Hermione Granger anymore. Hermione Granger was a muggle born, raised by two dentists. The Hermione she was now wasn't all that.

Now she was just Hermione. With no last name because she had no father that could give her an identity. For all she knew she was an orphan. Her mother murdered and maybe her father also. What if she never found out who he was?

Sirius and Remus were her only possible links to the truth. They would have known if Marlene was dating somebody or had a friend with benefits but she could never asked them. She wanted to yell, scream and demand answers from them but she knew she couldn't.

'How will I ever find out!'

The tears continued to flow, soft sobs escaped from her.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Sorry for the long wait and the short chapter. I'll update the next chapter soon. It's finished...**_

_**Okay this chapter is a step towards relationships...**_

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Suddenly she heard somebody yell, it wasn't the damned painting, it sounded like Sirius. Wiping the tears from her face and got up. When she opened the door she could hear Sirius yell at somebody, he was in the library.

Curious and a bit worried she walked carefully towards the library.

"I can't Remus!" She heard Sirius scream. His voice sounded like he was in agony.

"You can't go on living like this, Padfoot." Remus said calmly.

"And why not! It's my damn house! I can do what ever I want!"

"What about when the Weasley's arrive? Huh? What will you do than? You have to stop wallowing in the past, you can't continue drinking and making a mess of yourself." Remus countered.

"This has nothing to do with the fucking Weasley's! I'm an adult, I can get drunk and remember my friends when ever I want." She could hear the anger in Sirius's voice.

"What about Harry?" Remus's voice started to rise. "Dammit Sirius, the boy needs you and you are killing yourself! James wouldn't want that."

"How the fuck could you know what James wanted!" a loud bang inside made Hermione grab her wand tightly. "We can't know, Remus, because he is DEAD!"

"James and Lily made YOU Harry's godfather! That means that when something would happen to them, they wanted you to take care of Harry! Stop living in the past, focus on Harry, he needs you more than anything."

"I… I can't Remus. I miss them too much. So much it hurts."

Hermione felt the tears coming back. All her pain and trouble seemed to pale in comparison to the pain she heard in Sirius's voice.

"I miss them too, Padfoot. So fucking much but fire-whiskey won't bring them back. Nothing will, we can only remember them and live our lives for them."

"I know, Remus but I can't, I can't forget how it felt. Her death… James's death… and Lily…all taken by that damn bastard!" Sirius roared out the last word, Hermione was sure everything in a ten mile radius would have heard him.

She had barely a second to recover when Remus exited the room. His face was tear stained as well. He barely managed a smile when he saw Hermione standing a few feet from the door.

"Are you alright?" Hermione whispered.

"I will be." Remus nodded. "You?" he asked as Hermione noticed his eyes running over her wet face.

"I will be, how is he?" she asked pointing to the library.

"A mess."

"I'll go to him." Hermione mused. She couldn't explain it but she felt like Sirius needed her. Maybe she could be of any comfort.

"If you think that's wise. Just don't be surprised if he throws a bottle at you."

Only than did Hermione noticed the glass chards in his hair. She smiled and reached up to pull out a rather large piece.

"Nice mess are we, huh?" she chuckled softly. It made Remus smile a bit wider. "Go clean up, I'll see what I can do for Sirius."

Remus nodded and went back upstairs, leaving Hermione in the hallway. Taking a deep calming breath before entering the library. She barely managed to keep in her shocked gasp as she saw the broken bottles lying around. In the far corner a candle burned brightly, lighting up the pictures that stood as a shrine of the past.

In the large comfy chair sat Sirius, his head in his hands and his shoulders shook slightly. Hermione was sure she could hear him cry. Slowly she walked towards him. Halfway she noticed the picture of Sirius's graduation day. It lay on the floor, the glass was not broken but she suspected that at one point Sirius had thrown it towards Remus during their argument.

Carefully she picked it up and dusted it off. The people in it started to wave at her and smile happily. She took a second to look at her mother again, taking in the similarities but also the differences. They were the key to her father but there weren't many.

Softly she placed the picture back to where it belonged. After a last glance she turned to Sirius. He had yet to move or even notice she was there. For minute she wondered what she could possibly do for him. It flashed through her mind that if it would be her father she would hug him, letting him know that she was always there but could she do that with a man she had only really known for a fortnight. 'Yes, I could.' She said to herself.

She sat down on the arm of the chair and wrapped her arms around Sirius. He stiffened first, almost pulled away but than he relaxed and welcomed her embrace. He let his head fall against her arm and Hermione rested her head on his. Words weren't needed. She just let him cry.

Her sleeve was already soaked through when Sirius calmed down and raised his head. His eyes met Hermione's and he tried to speak, Hermione quickly placed her finger in front of lips.

"Don't apologize." She whispered.

"I wanted to say, thank you." He mumbled around her finger. She laughed at that and pulled away her finger.

"Than you are welcome." She said with a soft smile.

"It has been a long time ago since somebody let me wet their shirt with my tears. It's really special what you did." He said. Hermione looked at him, his voice was a bit different, it was honest and thankful, almost relived.

"You can cry on my shoulder whenever you need it Sirius." She whispered.

"Thank you."

He pulled her in a hug, his strong arms around her and Hermione felt completely safe. It was like all her fear, pain and frustration was taken away by his arms. When he released her and looked at her face she notice his eyes widened a bit.

"Do you need a shoulder to cry on?" He asked, he wasn't even joking. He looked dead serious and almost worried. Hermione couldn't help but chuckle a bit. She couldn't deny that she needed somebody for support, a shoulder to cry on but she was sure that Sirius wasn't the best option at the moment. She would have to spill too many things she needed to keep a secret from him, for now.

"No, I can't talk about it, yet." She sighed.

"Talking helps." He pressed.

"I know." Hermione sighed. Only wishing Harry was there, he would probably understand her the most. Maybe she could talk about it a bit. Just keep it simple. "It is really complicated. First the return of you-know-who, Cedric's death, Harry having to battle _him_ again, it wasn't the best end of my school year and than I got home and my parents tell me I was adopted."

"Adopted?" Sirius asked surprised.

"Yeah, I never knew. I even thought I looked like my dad and now I found out that they weren't even my real parents. Not by blood at least."

"Blood doesn't count." Sirius said quickly. "Look at me, I'm from one of the purest bloodlines but my blood relatives are my enemies, James's parents were my real parent. They cared for me, love me, and let me be me."

"I know." Hermione sighed. "I know my adoptive parents love me and have been my real parents but it just throws everything around. It's just another crazy thing on top of an other. Sometimes it's just too much all at once."

"Do you know who your biological parents are?" he suddenly asked. Hermione had feared this question from the moment she started talking. McGonagall had said not to lie but as she looked are the room she knew she couldn't tell Sirius that one of his best friend had kept something major a secret from them.

"They know who my mother is." Hermione whispered. "They don't know anything about my father."

"Can you meet your mother? It might help if you talk to her, maybe she can help you cope." Sirius said quickly but Hermione already shook her head.

"She is dead, Sirius." Hermione whispered.

"Oh…Oh I'm so sorry." He said and pulled back in a hug. "The first war?" He asked softly. Hermione could only nod. "And your father?"

Hermione pulled back and looked up at him. "They don't know, there were only two people who knew and they are both dead. Even my biological father didn't know about her pregnancy."

"That sucks." He sighed.

"Yeah, tell me about it." Hermione sighed. She glanced at the clock and noticed it was already ten in the morning. Her stomach growled at her for the lack of food. "Why don't you go and take a shower, I'll make breakfast." Hermione suggested.

Sirius looked around, he blinked a few times and sighed. "Yeah, I will, I'll clean this up first."

Hermione left the library and started on breakfast.

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	8. Chapter 8

**Here is the promised longer update... **

**I hope you all like it and let me know what you think of it... so please review...**

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8. The waiting.

They spend the day reading and doing nothing. They all felt drained and tired. Hermione made a start with her summer homework and asked Remus is he could pick up a book for school the next time he went to Diagon Alley. The whole day Hermione kept her mind busy with other things than the identity of her father, she just didn't want to think about it for a while.

More distraction came later in the evening when Hedwig arrived with a letter for her and one for Sirius.

_Hermione,_

_I can't believe that you tell me not to do anything stupid! I know that I should behave but it's bloody frustrating to be locked up and nobody seems to care about your well-being! You'd expect at least Dumbledore to remember me!_

_Sorry I'm ranting, I'm just fed up with everything. I can't wait to see you all too._

_As for your question, I don't know what Ron will think, have you written him at all? He sends me a letter that he hadn't heard from you yet. I wrote him back telling him you were probably busy with your homework. _

_Ron also wrote me that he won't stay in the Burrow for much longer, please tell me you aren't where he is going, that would be so unfair._

_How is your search coming?_

_Please forget about safety, give me some news?"_

_Harry._

"Oh dear." Hermione sighed.

"You can say that." Sirius sighed. "I'll ask Dumbledore about it when he gets here tomorrow."

"Yeah, I'll write him back and I really need to write Ron." Hermione nodded. "I think I'm going up, write the letters and get some sleep."

"Good night, Hermione." Remus whispered as he looked up from his book.

"Goodnight, Remus, Sirius."

"Sleep well." Sirius said as he scanned the letter Harry had sent him again.

Hermione sighed and shock her head. She made her way upstairs, got ready for bed and started on her reply for Harry. She noticed Hedwig was waiting in her window to bring back a letter for Harry.

_Dear Harry,_

_You know why I ask you not to do anything stupid, I care about you and your safety. We all care about your safety and you know it, so don't play that card on me. _

_I'll write Dumbledore to ask him about your situation but I can't promise anything, Dumbledore is probably really busy. _

_Thanks for reminding me about writing Ron, I always assumed I would see you and Ron soon again. I wrote you because I needed to tell somebody who would understand about my situation. And I really need to talk to you! I wish you were here._

_As for my search. I feel like I'm failing, sometimes I think that I know but it's just too ridiculous to even consider it to be the truth. I have my mother's diary, which I'm reading but it only makes me more and more confused. I really hate not knowing!_

_As for news, I really don't have any! They won't let me know anything but from what I gather is that it's just the quiet for the storm. I have the feeling they are expecting something but I don't know for sure. _

_Be careful_

_Love Hermione._

She read through her letter and decided that Harry would have every right to hex her when she saw him. He would be angry and upset with her and probably with Sirius. She sighed and sealed the letter.

"Hedwig, do you mind stopping by the Burrow first? I need to send Ron a letter?"

The owl hooted softly, Hermione took that as a yes and started on Ron's letter.

_Dear Ron,_

_I'm sorry I haven't written you sooner. I have been really busy. Take it, I still haven't received a letter from you. _

_I got a letter from Dumbledore today. He asks if it is alright to escort me to a safe place to spend the remaining holiday with you all. Of course I said, yes, I will be excited to spend the summer with you and Harry. I hope Harry will be there too, I don't know if Dumbledore contacted him. So I guess I'll see you soon._

_Dumbledore says there is somebody here to pick me up Tuesday. So I'll see you soon!_

_Love Hermione,_

_PS, have you done your homework already?_

She knew the answer of her question but she had to pretend nothing was up. After sealing the letter she gave them to Hedwig and watched the white owl fly away.

Hermione told Remus and Sirius about the little lie she told Ron. The seemed to agree that it was indeed best to pretend that Dumbledore invited her for her own safety, both Molly and Ron would believe that easily and it would explain why she was already there when they arrived.

The next day they discussed how to go about the Weasley's, Sirius foresaw issues with the painting of his mother but also with the twins wanting information. Remus and Hermione mostly worried about Molly taking over the house-hold. Molly could be very restricting.

To be completely honest neither of them were looking forward to share a house with all the Weasleys but Sirius was happy to have more people in his house. He honestly told Remus and Hermione that he like having the Weasleys around and enjoyed spending time with them but that he still felt locked up and stuck in a house that he hated. He hoped that once the Weasleys got there the house would feel more cheery, more happy.

Tuesday arrived and Hermione still had to pick up her research for her true father. She had abandoned the diary since that day she comforted Sirius. She had decided to focus on making him and Remus happy. The present was more important. During those days she grew really close to Sirius and Remus. Neither of them would talk about the past but they talked about Harry, about how Ginny was so in love with him. They talked about Ron and how he fitted into the group. They played games, Remus taught Hermione how to play proper wizards chess, Sirius didn't care for chess but he would come up with other silly things to do. Hermione really enjoyed her stay with them.

It was almost time for the Weasleys to arrive and Hermione felt like she was failing in her search and it annoyed her. She was the Hogwarts know-it-all of the century, she didn't fail.

"Hermione!" Somebody called her out of her deep thoughts.

"Yes, Remus?" She said as she looked up at the open door of the library.

"Albus Dumbledore is here he wants to talk to you. In private."

"That won't make Sirius happy." She murmured making Remus chuckle.

"No, not really, Dumbledore will be here in a minute, after Sirius stops arguing about Harry."

Hermione nodded and smiled at herself. Sirius sure could argue for someone if he needed to. It didn't help Sirius much that he had a short temper and regularly lost it, especially with Dumbledore, for whom he harbored not so friendly feelings for at the moment.

Five minutes later there was a short knock on the door and Dumbledore walked into the library.

"Good evening miss Granger." He said as noticed her in the far corner.

"Good evening professor Dumbledore." She said with a smile. She had spent the last five minutes wondering what he would want from her. She watched as he walked up next to her. His eyes were soft, friendly and almost grandfatherly.

"I know I haven't seen you since I left at you parents house, I'm sorry I left you on your own after that." He said softly.

"It's okay." Hermione shrugged. "I think you are quite busy enough with Fudge being an idiot and all. Besides Remus and Sirius had been great hosts."

"You are quite right but that doesn't excuse my behavior. I should have made time for you earlier." He said. "How are you doing?"

"I'm alright, frustrated, annoyed and sad but alright." Hermione said honestly.

"Have you been able to find out anything?"

"Not as much as I would like. Remus and Sirius have told me bit about Marlene but as it stands now the only candidates to be my dad are Peter Pettigrew, Remus and Sirius, James was already with Lily and Neville's parents were also together, ridiculous of course." the idea still made her laugh. Though she knew that she wouldn't object to either one. Peter was already rejected just because she didn't want to even think about that possibility, she just couldn't imagine it. Remus was very shy, even now when there was woman around he was shy and Sirius was the complete opposite. He was flirty and boisterous. She couldn't imagine someone like her mother would go for either of that.

"Why would that be ridiculous?" Albus Dumbledore asked her. Her mouth popped open in complete horror and shock, her eyes wide as she stared at the headmaster. "In all seriousness Hermione, you have to consider we were at war. Back then you didn't know who you could trust or who would betray you. See what happened to Peter Pettigrew. You have to consider that your mother didn't have many dating opportunities."

"She could have gone out on a date in the muggle world." Hermione immediately voicing what she had been thinking about all the time.

"Perhaps but it is very unlikely."

"Why?"

"Because she would sign a death sentence for that muggle. Order members were tracked, tailed and watched whenever they went outside the safety of their homes. If Marlene had a date with a muggle the Death Eaters would know soon enough and kill them both. Marlene knew that, I don't think she would ever wanted that risk."

"But it can't be ruled out." Hermione protested. Just the idea of accepting that Remus or Sirius was her real biological father was hard. "And also it could have been another wizard that she knew. Maybe he is already dead."

Dumbledore nodded and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"I would be careful about refusing to believe it is either Remus or Sirius." He said softly. "In my eyes they are your best guesses."

"Do you know for sure, professor?"

"No but from the moment I knew your mother was pregnant I expected the father be either one of them, I just don't know which one. I hope you will be able to find that out. Minerva told me she has given you the book she wouldn't give to me."

"My mother's diary."

"Yes, I would have read it to find out who was your father but Minerva told me that it was under a blood protection, the diary only opens to the one with Marlene's blood."

Hermione hadn't thought of that, she had wondered why they hadn't read it and just placed her with her father but now it made sense.

"On another note," Dumbledore continued, "I was impressed with your little lie you send to the Weasleys but I would rather that next time you inform me as well, it saves me from surprises."

"Oh, sorry, I thought Remus or Sirius would have told you, professor."

"Lets say it was a small miscommunications." He chuckled. "and on the subject on communication, as I will ask Ron tomorrow, I want you to keep what you tell Harry to a minimum."

"I have been doing that already, sir, but you know how Harry is. He is locked up there with people he hates and hates him. He is getting more frustrated by the minute and once he finds out where I am and that Ron is with me… I'm afraid that he will do something stupid. He will do something rash."

"I'm worried about that as well but he has a twenty-four hour guard there, they will take care of his safety." Dumbledore said calmly.

"If he finds out, you should be worried more about their safety than Harry's." Hermione murmured darkly. Dumbledore didn't reply but she heard him chuckle softly. "Sir?"

"Yes, Hermione?"

"Why is it that Harry has to stay with his aunt and uncle? The Burrow or here would be much saver for him, these places are both extremely protected with old magic. Why is his aunt and uncle's house saver?"

"I can't tell you everything about that, miss Granger, would it suffice that I tell you Harry is protected by a blood bond."

Hermione looked up at the headmaster, slowly she started to understand what Dumbledore meant. She slowly nodded.

"Trust me, I do not wish this treatment onto Harry but I had no other choice when his parents died."

Hermione nodded silently.

"I have to leave, I'm afraid I won't see you again before school starts. Though if you have trouble with your quest and you want to talk about it, Minerva and I will be happy to help. Good evening." He turned to walk away.

"Sir!" Hermione called, he turned around and looked at her. "Thank you for your time."

"You are welcome." He said with a smile and left the room.

Dumbledore had given Hermione a lot to think about but she had so little time to do that. By the time he left she was dead on her feet and went to bed soon after. She didn't sleep well that night, she kept dreaming about her mother and about how it would have been had she lived.

The next morning went by in frenzy, leaving Hermione very little time to herself. Sirius was finishing up cleaning the last bedroom, while Remus helped Hermione to disguise the fact that she had already been living there for a while. It wasn't really exciting work but she enjoyed spending a bit of time with the werewolf. Remus turned out to be a fun loving person and wasn't nearly as reserved as she initially thought. He really was a part of the Marauders as she had heard about them from Sirius.

Spending time with Remus did bring up the questions Hermione had about her real father. Whenever he didn't look at her, Hermione scanned Remus's features, in the hope, and fear that she would recognize something of herself in him. A few times he caught her looking, once he asked if something was bothering her but she just shook her head. She was afraid that if she would talk she would say too much too soon.

They had just finished when the Weasleys arrived.

"You better stay here, Hermione. I'll send Ron and Ginny up." Remus said softly and left.

She looked after him as she went over Dumbledore's words from last night again. She still couldn't believe that Dumbledore honestly thought that either Remus or Sirius would be her father. Logically Dumbledore's explanation made sense, too much sense for her liking but that didn't make it anymore believable.

Hermione laughed at the irony of it all, '_that would make me a pure blood witch with a father that is either a wrongfully convicted murdered who has spend the last too many years in jail or a werewolf_.' She shook her head, though she like both men a lot and loved hanging out wit them it was just a difficult idea to accept.

There was a loud knock on the door.

"Hermione!" Sirius called and opened the door. "Ginny is here. Ron will be staying in the room next to you."

"Okay." She said with a smile, he really looked happier with a lot of people around him. Sirius winked as he left the door open for Ginny. Before Hermione could react the red head flung her arms around Hermione and hugged her tightly.

"Hello Hermione!" She screamed.

"Hey, Ginny." Hermione said as she patted the red heads shoulder.

"Oh, Hermione, how are you? I haven't received one letter from you, Ron said you only send him a letter once and that you were obsessed with your study." Ginny rattled on.

"Ginny! Easy!" Hermione yelped. Though Sirius wasn't the calmest of people to be around with, Hermione wasn't used to the excitement anymore.

"What?" she demanded.

"Yes, I have been reading a lot, besides I don't have an owl to send you letters with."

"Oh." Ginny's face fell. "I forgot about that. I'm so used to communicating through owls that I totally forgot you don't have one."

"It's alright, I was really busy. I have taken time to write Harry though, he really need it."

"Yeah, Ron said something like that. I just don't know what to write him, every time I think about him I shut down." Ginny groaned.

"You really need to get over him, Ginny."

"I know." She sighed as she sat down on her bed. "I just wish he could see me as something else besides Ron's annoying little sister."

"You'll first need to get over your crush. You'll have to be able to talk to him if you want him to notice you. You are a fun girl to hang around with, maybe if you loosen up, focus on someone else than Harry, he might find out that you are a girl too."

Ginny sighed and nodded. She looked like she wanted to ask something but Ron came storming in.

"Ronald! Don't you knock?" Hermione yelped as the door opened with a loud bang. Ron properly blushed and mumbled a sort of apology but it was drowned by the twins quite literally popping in.

Hermione gave up and sighed, with them around there was no peace and quiet.

She spend the rest of the afternoon talking to the Weasley's, mostly about Harry but the Weasley's couldn't stop gushing about how excited it must be to live in the Headquarters of the resistance. Hermione already knew that there was nothing excited about it but she didn't say anything, they would find out soon enough.

When Molly called them down for dinner Hermione was tired and a headache was beating down on her temples.

"Are you alright?" Sirius asked as he helped her making the table read for dinner.

"Yeah, I forgot how overwhelming they could be. I have a headache from just four of them."

"I completely understand. Though I much enjoy having them around."

"Me too, don't get me wrong but the twins and Ron could be so tiring."

Sirius chuckled and walked away, just in time because Molly was walking towards them. By one look Hermione could tell that Molly didn't approve of Sirius. Hermione wondered why, Sirius had taken a shower that morning. Hermione had tried to tame the beast. To Hermione, Sirius, did look presentable. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that he still was a convicted murderer on the loose.

Over the next week Hermione never figured out why Molly didn't like Sirius, to be honest she didn't get to see Sirius or Remus all that much and even less chance to talk to them. Molly kept a close eye on the children in the house to prevent them from hearing or noticing anything to do with the Order.

Even if it wasn't Molly watching her every move, it was either Ginny or Ron that always seemed to be around. The dairy of her mother hadn't even been touched that week, Hermione was scared that Ron or Ginny would notice what she was reading and ask difficult questions.

Hermione felt seriously trapped.

If it wasn't for that little snug she could escape to late in the evenings Hermione would have gone insane. Still even getting there was difficult. She would pretend to be tired or wanting to study but sadly that didn't seem to give her, her much needed privacy either, most of the time Ginny was right on her heels.

"Urgh." Hermione groaned as she finally found an escape from the Weasleys and crashed next to Sirius on the small sofa.

"Hey, I thought you forgot how to get here." He teased her.

"Don't remind me." She sighed as her head fell back against the comfortable pillow. "I can't believe how annoying Mrs. Weasley is! She is trying to keep us so innocent and in the dark. The mother of Fred and George for crying out loud."

Sirius laughed at Hermione's antics.

"She is only trying to protect you." he said reasonable.

"From what?" Hermione snapped, "From the truth? Isn't that what Fudge is doing as well? Or from the Death Eaters, like they come and walk up to us here. She is only preventing us for gaining the information we might need to survive."

"Hey, easy!" Sirius yelped as Hermione punched the sofa in her temper. "It isn't the couch's fault."

Hermione glared at him, he was seriously enjoying her temper and her antics. A twinkle rested in his eyes that made him look a lot younger.

"Why doesn't Mrs. Weasley like you?" Hermione suddenly asked.

Sirius laughed and shook his head. Apparently it was a good story because he set up straight and drowned his glass of fire-whiskey.

"Molly, is… how do you say it… very conservative." Sirius chuckled. "And as you already know, I'm not."

"That's no surprise." Hermione mumbled. "What did you do?"

"What did I do?" Sirius asked in mock shock.

"Don't even try, Sirius. Mrs. Weasley wouldn't do anything out of line." She laughed.

"Okay, okay, I admit I might have been a bit out of line according to Molly but hey I was young back than." Sirius laughed and set back to start his story. "When we just joined the Order, James thought it was fun to organize a Christmas party. I got drunk and lets say I wasn't very subtle about the feelings I had for a certain woman. Molly couldn't live with the fact that I forgot that my girl and myself were on the dance floor. According to Molly, doing certain things have to wait until after marriage. Which is why she and Arthur married two months out of school." Sirius finished with a wink.

"Wait, you had sex on the dance floor in front of the whole Order?" Hermione asked in complete shock.

"No, no. She wouldn't let me go that far. We were just having a bit of drunken fun." Sirius laughed. "After that Molly lectured me thousands of times about how to behave like a proper gentlemen. To no avail, I dare say."

"Unbelievable." Hermione sighed and shook her head.

Sirius laughed and poured himself another shot of fire-whiskey.

They spend a comfortable evening together, both with their feet on the table, Sirius drinking and Hermione reading. Sometimes Sirius would ask her something about school or about Harry, sometimes Hermione felt him staring at her for a long time. She wondered what he was thinking when he stared at her but she felt it wasn't appropriate to ask. Too personal.

After an hour or two she closed her book and yawned.

"When do you think Dumbledore will let Harry come here?" she asked as she placed the book on the table.

"I don't know, I expect it to be before the Hogwarts letters arrive, I mean somebody has to make sure he gets his books and all, so it would be practical for him to be here before that."

"That's at least two more weeks." Hermione groaned.

"I know but I can't argue with Dumbledore anymore, he'll hex me next time, I think."

"Poor Harry." Hermione sighed. Sirius nodded in agreement. "Well I'm off or Mrs. Weasley will kick my ass about not sleeping enough."

"Goodnight Hermione."

"Goodnight Sirius."


	9. Chapter 9

_**Hello All, I'm sorry for the wait. I know those who read my other stories are waiting even longer... As some of you all might have read at my profile, I have been really sick. I have spend a week in the hospital and only just got out last week. Besides not feeling well at all I haven't been able to spend time with my laptop at all. I couldn't concentrate one bit.**_

_**Since this week I'm writing again but it goes slowly. My concentration is still really bad. To do stories justice I won't post anything that I haven't been able to properly edit. **_

_**This chapter has been edited a couple of times so I'm hopeful there aren't many mistakes. I hope you love it all...please review!**_

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**9. Knowing Remus.**

Almost week later nothing had changed. Hermione barely got a moment to herself. Molly wouldn't leave anyone out of her sight. Hermione had only been able to sneak into the snug for some quiet reading twice and the dairy still wasn't opened. She was close to despair, she really had hoped that she would find her real father before school started but she wasn't any closer to the truth.

To Hermione's surprise Remus had noticed her inner turmoil.

She had managed to slip away from the Weasleys and entered the snug to find only Remus there.

"Where is Sirius?" she asked in surprise as she noticed the mischievous marauder missing.

"Feeding Buckbeak." Remus shrugged.

Hermione nodded and sat down to read. Something was nagging her, she itched to continue reading the dairy but she was ever mindful of McGonagall's warning that Remus and Sirius would probably recognize the book and would ask questions she wasn't ready to answer.

"Is something wrong, Hermione?" Remus suddenly asked kindly.

"No, why would something be wrong?"

"You look upset." He pointed out.

"It's nothing." Hermione sighed hoping that Remus would drop it.

"Hermione?" Remus suddenly asked carefully. She looked up at him. "I… Sirius told me about you."

"What about me?" she asked carefully, though she knew the answer already.

"About you found out that you were adopted."

"Oh that." She tried to pretend she really didn't care about it.

"Yes, that." His voice told her that he saw right through her. "Hermione, it isn't a shameful thing if you need to talk about something like that. It must have been a hard thing to deal with, especially here, when you were almost on your own, with two older, almost strangers."

Hermione laughed at his last comments.

"Remus, you aren't a stranger, I know you have difficulties with believing that people trust you but I do, just as I trust Sirius."

"That's very nice of you." Remus said softly. The look in his eyes told her that he wasn't going to let it go and she sighed.

"I appreciate your concern, Remus, I really do but I can't talk about it much. I don't know all that much. Not even who my real father was."

"It must have been a shock to hear that who you thought to be your parents weren't your real parents." Remus pressed.

"It was." Hermione admitted. "I even thought I looked like my father."

"How did they react to it all?" Remus asked.

It got Hermione off guard, it seemed like Remus knew more than she had ever told Sirius. It dawned on her that Dumbledore or McGonagall must have given them a reason why Hermione would arrive well before the Weasleys.

"What do you know about it?" She asked Remus carefully.

Remus didn't look surprised as Hermione expected, he just sighed and ran his hand over his face.

"Dumbledore was here the day after Voldemort returned to ask Sirius if he would welcome you to his home within a week's time. It was surprising. We had expected you, Harry and Ron to show up somewhere during the summer but not you alone and so early in the summer. Sirius accepted it happily and went to clean out your room. Naturally I wanted to know why."

"Naturally." Hermione chuckled.

"Dumbledore told me that you were much like Harry, your history. That you were born to a witch who was killed in the first war with Voldemort, that Dumbledore himself found foster family for you and that they just told you about it all. He says that you are in much more danger than any other wizarding child besides Harry, especially when your true identity was revealed."

"Did he tell you anything about my mother and father?" Hermione asked. She had difficulty hiding her anger with Dumbledore. She had been so carefully to hide everything from Remus and Sirius, thinking they shouldn't know yet and Dumbledore just told them!

"No, he has forbidden me to ask you. A day before you got here he told Sirius that you would arrive early because of private issues but that they were too personal to ask about." Remus said with a sigh. "A good thing too because Sirius was very curious about why you would arrive before the Wealeys. I was even more interested in your story."

"Why?" Hermione asked.

"Though, many people died during that first war, it were normally muggles that were the victim. Of all the witches and wizards who died we knew most of them. Due to our 'purity of blood', social meetings we had to attend and school, James, Sirius and I knew almost everybody who got killed but from all those witches I never knew anybody who was pregnant in the period that you were born. Who ever it was hid it well."

Hermione started to feel slightly sick.

"I still can't tell you. I'm sorry, Remus, I can't." Hermione whispered. She really wanted to, it pained her not to but something held her back. She wasn't sure what it was but it hurting her, like it was ready to burst out of her at the seams. "I'm sorry." She muttered, tears started to spill and she got up and ran out. She almost bumped into Sirius on the landing but she didn't stop to answer his unspoken but clear question on his face.

"What's wrong? Where were you?" Ginny asked as soon as Hermione closed the door behind her. She was shaking, crying and in emotional pain. All she wanted was to talk about it, preferably with Sirius and Remus, only they and her mother's dairy could help her but this was Ginny. Should she tell? Could she tell? Would Ginny keep the secret?

Ginny got up from her bed and walked over to Hermione, she was still standing against the door. Crying softly.

"Come sit." Ginny whispered as she lead Hermione to the bed. "Now, what is wrong with you?"

Hermione shook her head.

"Ow, come on! You sneak out all the time, you are too silent, you haven't even harassed Ron about homework. Something is going on. You aren't seeing someone, are you?"

Hermione laughed through her tears. "No, Gin, that's not it."

"Oh, good." The red head said with a sigh. "you aren't pregnant are you?"

"No!" Hermione yelped.

"Than what is wrong?" Ginny pressed one more time. Hermione felt the burning painful desire to talk about it all turning in full force. Perhaps she would have to trust Ginny.

"Can you keep a secret?" Hermione asked.

"Of course."

"I mean, really a secret. A secret that when leaked could destroy lives?" Hermione pressed again. Ginny seemed a bit startled by Hermione's seriousness but nodded carefully. "Besides me, only McGonagall and Dumbledore knows the truth. Harry, Remus and Sirius only know half."

"I'll keep it a secret, I promise." Ginny whispered. Hermione nodded and sighed, _where to begin_?

"When I got home from King's cross, my parents told me I'm adopted."

"No?" Ginny gasped.

"Yes, they were so sad."

"Why did they tell you now? I mean you were so upset over the whole thing at school, couldn't they have waited? Or tell you before you went to Hogwarts?" Ginny immediately fired questions.

"Wait, wait. Let me tell you everything first" Hermione pleaded. Ginny nodded and stayed silent. "Do you know Harry's story? About how he came to live with his muggle family?"

"Yeah, not all the details but I know Dumbledore placed him there after he vanquished he-who-must-not-be-named."

"Well, my story is something similar."

"Wait, you aren't Harry's sister are you?" Ginny asked suddenly.

"Ginny!" Hermione moaned. The girl looked properly ashamed and Hermione continued. "My story is similar with the exception that you-know-who didn't know of my existence. I wasn't there the night he attacked my mother's house and family. She had hidden her pregnancy from everybody, even from my real father, except from McGonagall, Dumbledore, her parents and her best friend."

Ginny's mouth fell open and her eyes grew wide in shock and worry.

"Are they all dead?" She whispered. "Your family?"

"I don't know." Hermione said sadly. "From my mother's side only McGonagall is alive, she was my mother's aunt. My real grandparents were killed during the attack on her home, Dumbledore said you-know-who killed them himself."

"And your father?"

"I don't know, nobody seems to know who my real father is. My mother never told anybody besides her best friend."

Ginny looked at her in surprise. "You have contacted her, right?"

"No, she is dead too." Hermione sighed sadly. Ginny sighed and shook her head.

"It's all so much." Ginny whispered.

"Tell me about it." Hermione groaned.

"Let me get this summed up." Ginny said. "You are not muggle born, your mother was a witch. Only a few people knew about her pregnancy?"

Hermione nodded.

"Do you know how old you were when your mother was killed?"

"A bit more than two weeks."

"So at two weeks old, Dumbledore placed you in a foster home. A muggle family."

"He says to keep me safe. He thinks that once my heritage is known I'll be about as hunted as him and Harry."

"Who was your mother?" Ginny asked. Hermione sighed and stared at her shoes. Should she tell, it couldn't hurt to tell Ginny, could it?

"Promise me you'll never tell anyone?" Hermione asked again.

"I promise."

"My mother was Marlene McKinnon." Hermione sighed.

"I have heard of that family before. They were a well known pure blood family." Ginny said. Hermione's interest was spiked and listened to Ginny's story about what she knew of the McKinnon family. Both girls never noticed the werewolf that seemed frozen on the landing.

Remus had come up to comfort Hermione, he didn't understand why she was so upset but at least he should offer her an apology. He shouldn't have pried on such a personal thing. When he reached her door he heard Ginny and Hermione talking.

He had heard only the last bit of their conversation. He had his hand raised to knock when he heard Hermione talk about her true mother.

"He says to keep me safe. He thinks that once my heritage is known I'll be about as hunted as him and Harry." Hermione had said. It spiked his interest and made him pause. Hermione was from an well-known important blood line. While it still could be many, it must have been one of the pure blood families that rallied against Voldemort.

"Who was your mother?" he heard Ginny asked. His instinct told him to not listen and later he would curse himself for not listening to that instinct. It was just that he didn't expect Hermione to tell Ginny. He knew it was a secret well guarded by Dumbledore and Hermione. Later he would realize that the girl needed to talk about it, preferably with somebody her own age. He realized that, that was what was hurting her so much. Keeping it a secret.

"Promise me you'll never tell anyone?" Hermione said. It should have been enough incentive for him to leave but he couldn't he couldn't make his legs to move.

"I promise." He barely made out. His slightly enhanced hearing caught Hermione's deep sigh

"My mother was Marlene McKinnon."

Remus had to grasp the door post for support. _That wasn't possible. Marlene was never pregnant!_

Suddenly he was angry, very angry at Dumbledore for lying at Hermione. Angry at Hermione for excepting all sorts of excuses so easily. Most of all he was angry at McGonagall, he believed McGonagall really cared a lot for her students, especially Hermione, than why would she approve such a lie. Couldn't they see it was hurting Hermione!

His anger reach boiling point and he found the ability to move again. He stormed away from the girls bedroom and down to the kitchen. Without acknowledging the presence of the twin, Molly and Arthur, he picked up a hand of floo powder and travelled to McGonagall's office.

It was an understatement to say that the witch was surprised by this late arrival.

"Remus?" She asked, "Why…" but he broke her off, his angered look was enough to stop her and made her realized that she had a feeling why he was in her office and so enraged.

"How could you?" He asked, almost screamed. "How could you do this to her, I thought you cared about her?"

"Remus…" McGonagall sighed. She sat down at her desk and rubbed her temples.

"Marlene couldn't have been pregnant! We would have known! She would have told us! Sirius of all! How could you and Dumbledore lie about such a sick thing!"

"Remus!" McGonagall tried again.

"And than tell that young girl she is related to Marlene and you! Do you have any idea how much it's hurting her, she believes every lie you told her! It's bad enough for her to know she's adopted! But than to lie to her about her real parentage! That's sick!"

"REMUS!" McGonagall shouted. The werewolf suddenly fell silent. For a second longer his anger held him up but soon it drained him and he fell into the chair at the other side of the desk, just shaking his head.

Minerva conjured up a glass of Odgen's finest for him and an white muggle wine for herself. Remus watched her, still angry, as she walked to her fire place and stuck her head in the green flames.

"Albus, you better come." She called. Just seconds later the wizard stepped out the fire place.

"How can I help you, Minerva?" Albus asked as he straightened himself. "Ah." He nodded as Remus glared at him.

"With that!" Minerva growled.

"How could you, Albus?" Remus asked again. He didn't feel as angry as before, more insulted and perhaps betrayed. A real friend of his and Sirius wouldn't go telling such a lies about the woman they loved most dearly. "How could you tell such a sick thing about Marlene? And to Hermione?"

Albus sighed and sat down, Minerva made sure he had the drink he needed.

"It wasn't a lie, Remus." Minerva whispered as she sat down as well.

"It has to be, we would have known. Marlene would have told at least Sirius. We would have seen it. Lily would have known, she wouldn't have shut up about it."

"Lily did know, Remus." Albus said. "She was the only one of your group of friends that knew. She hadn't even told James."

"That's impossible!" Remus nearly shouted.

"Marlene knew she was in danger. You all were but her parents openly defied Voldemort and his actions. Next to the Potters and the Longbottom family, Marlene's family was high on the kill list of Voldemort. Marlene's talents and heritage placed her on his most wanted list. He wanted her to join his ranks badly." Ablus started to explain. Remus couldn't help but looking skeptically. "When Marlene found out she was pregnant she got scared. She wanted the child badly but she didn't want her child to grow up in a world full of dangers. The McKinnon heritage was enough to ensure that the child would be in danger while Voldemort still lived. She decided to keep it hidden. Together with Lily she worked out a set of glamours that concealed any evidence of her pregnancy. When she was five months into her pregnancy she told me about it."

"Why would she tell you and not Sirius?"

"I don't know why she never told you all." Albus admitted. "I urged her to at least tell the father of the child but she refused. Claiming it was better for the safety of the child that her true blood line wasn't revealed before Voldemort and his Death Eaters were defeated."

Remus sighed and pressed the palm of his hands against his eyes. It was all a lie, wasn't it?

"Do you have prove that Hermione is indeed Marlene's child?"

"Her diary." Minerva said.

"What about it?"

"Remember how many fights Marlene had with Sirius and James about them trying to read it?"

Remus nodded. "They never could." He chuckled darkly.

"The diary has a blood seal on it. Only those of Marlene blood can open it. That meant only she and her children would be able to open it. Hermione can." Minerva said.

"Besides that, Remus, you have lived with Hermione for a few weeks now. Tell me, can you really don't see how much she is like Marlene?" Albus said.

Albus was right, he had indeed marveled at the similarities, from the moment he had met her in her third year. Over the last few days he had indeed wondered a few times if Hermione wasn't a reincarnation of Marlene. There were a few things different about her but even her voice sounded the same as she read out loud to Sirius. _Sirius!? He didn't know!_

"What did you tell Hermione about her father?" Remus asked.

"Not much, we don't know who the father is, I believe Marlene only ever told Lily the true identity of the father's child." Albus said.

"Not much, so you did tell her something."

"I told Hermione about my suspicions and in what direction I thought she had to look if she wanted to find her real father. She has the diary, I think with that and her research skills she'll be able to figure it out quite quickly."

Though he still found it very unreal, small things slowly started to make sense. The way Hermione watched him when they worked together, the way she listened very closely when he and Sirius talked about the past and the way she always seemed to search for something in them…them…

"Wait, what suspicions? What exactly did you tell Hermione?" Remus asked.

"I told her that her best bet was either you or Sirius. I know that both of you were really close to her and that both of you had a thing with her at school but I never knew what happened between you three after school." Albus admitted.

Remus shook his head again.

"I'm not Hermione's father." He said. "Marlene and I had our thing at school but later we were just really close friends. I seriously can't believe it. How come Hermione survived the attack?"

"Hermione wasn't there at the time." Minerva said. "Two and half weeks after she gave birth Marlene toke her parents out for dinner to thank them for all their support during the pregnancy. I was baby sitting for her, here at Hogwarts."

"Unbelievable." Remus whispered. It was so hard to wrap his head around it all. In his mind there was no doubt that if Hermione was indeed Marlene's child that Sirius was her father. Sirius and Marlene had their thing, they couldn't live with and without each other. They were both very passionate and it collided sometimes, ending either in firework or explosive anger.

He also couldn't believe he never noticed her pregnancy. If he counted back properly he knew he had seen Marlene almost daily during her pregnancy, except for the last month or so.

"She wasn't on a mission for you, was she?" He asked Albus.

"No, I told her to take some time off, she needed rest and though she wanted to fight it was better this way and she knew it." Albus said softly. "Remus, you said you aren't the father, does that means that Sirius is Hermione's father?"

The werewolf snapped up his head and looked right into the electric blue once of the headmaster.

"I can't think of anyone else." He said without a second of thought. "They loved each other dearly, they had their fights and differences but they couldn't live without each other. Sirius is still dying inside over her death."


End file.
